To start, let me say, this book is not a memoir. It is however a life's story. Stories told from throughout her own life; what she's learned and what she's taken away from it and able to share. Some were personal and some were fun. As one who has lived to tell, coming from a family dynasty of entertainers, paving and making a way on her own; here she is, telling her story her story her way; Drew Barrymore.Drew had grown up in the aesthetics of 1975 West Hollywood. A type of environment in which kids would normally question their surroundings. Drew's mother, then named IIdiko Jaid, raised her daughter as a single mother. Jaid was an aspiring actress who did bit parts here and there, and worked 2 jobs: one who was at the infamous Comedy Store and the notorious Troubadour. Jaid lived a life within those surroundings and environment. The whole scene that was very hedonistic and a part of their lives. The atmosphere within their duplex in which they resided was a part of life. It taught Drew that beauty could live in a seedy area. Neighboring children became a best friend to Drew. A typical West Hollywood friendship. Drew was actually proud that these single moms could provide a 2-bedroom situation for the kids. A happy fantasy land for them. They were the most stable and happy years Dew ever had.
But when she turned 7, after E.T. premiered and starting to get others film offers, mother and daughter's lifes were changing. Change was scary and it was a change that Drew was NOT in for or awaiting. Jaid was making those changes that made Drew uncomfortable. With changes happening at a rapid rate, Drew felt the heartbreak. Later Jaid had come home; quit her job and told Drew she was going to manage her daughter's career full time. Then awaited to her they were moving to the Valley! Drew was disgusted. KNOWING she would be the breadwinner now. Moving away from everything Drew knew to Sherman Oaks in 1983. There is still a bit of Sherman Oaks in Drew within her accent and language. As an adult, Drew was determined to get back to HQ and moved back to West Hollywood. She was in charge of her destiny. Things may have changed but still the same with time. Drew takes her kids to the same park she went to as a kid. Wanting to be in the familiar.
When her grandfather would hang out with W. C. Fields, W.C. was apparently obsessed with his rose garden. A man after Drew's own heart. They both loved the agriculture of flowers. They both loved the agriculture of flowers. Like the kids in the neighborhood, these flowers were wild. Wildflowers. Defy tradition & stand out. Drew and her friend, Cameron Diaz are type you would call your Lucy-to-your-Ethel; your Laverne-to-your-Shirley. Knowing each other since Drew was 14 and Cameron was 16, meeting in the late '80s in West Hollywood. Both had been hanging around similar circles for many years. Drew liked a girls girl and Cameron was definitely that. But when Drew called her due to producing Charlie's Angels and dared her to come play they became so close. Cameron was Being John Malkovich and Drew arranged a phone call for them so that she could pitch her movie because a script hadn't even been written. Drew described the tone & the sisterhood and the capability of these women. After the film ended, they continued their journey as friends and thrill seekers. Now they are older and are still the closest of friends. Drew was Cameron's bridesmaid to her wedding; and Cameron is the godmother to Drew's daughter, Frankie. She is her ride-or-die. Her Thelma to her Louise.
Drew's father, John Drew Barrymore, simply wasn't a "dad" to Drew. He was a mythical creature. John had separated from Jaid when she was pregnant. He was to be taken in small doses due to being wild. But those small doses were memorable. Sometimes dark, sometimes humorous, sometimes quotable. No one would've ever guessed John would have ended up being the man he was at the time. John was his father's only son, and had been a promising actor when he was young. At what was promising became total sabotage. More of someone you would try to keep out. The truth is that Drew never lived with her father. Never had a dinner with both of her parents. She never knew of the Jaid & John Story and how they came to be. They had a tulmultious few years together and separated prior to Drew's birth.Jaid & John were both incapable of being parents, and Drew doesn't fault them for it. They gave Drew a blueprint through their behavior of what NOT to do w/ her own kids. STABLE CONSISTENCY! Drew is lucky that the cards she's been dealt that showed her what it's like not to have a family. After what she's seen & lived through, Drew is a MOM to her kids. When she thinks about her dad, she thinks most about when he got cancer and she actually got to take care of awhile. She was in her late 20s at the time.
John had gotten kicked out of the first hospice house she had put him in for disorderly conduct. Drew had to find him somewhere to live due to needing medical attention 24-7 at this stage of his multiple myeloma, so hanging out at Drew's wasn't an option. She finally found a place that were SAINTS at handling John's unreasonable DEMANDS. John's behavior was that like Cleopatra on the throne of his temporary beds. For as long as Drew knew him, or barely knew him, he was always coming or going from somewhere else living off the land in the gypsy life. When he did show up, it nothing new to Drew. It was just her dad; while others watched in awe. Jaid & John fought like pathetic poets, but Jaid just made a terrible choice on John and he wanted to be worshipped from afar without the dare of an expectation.
Many years later, after not seeing him for about 7-8 years, and Drew stood next to her dad. He was around 50 or something and drugs and the road had taken what was JOHN! She went from damaged kid to wanting to kick his ass status and the playing field just leveled and they could become friends. Letting go of the resentment. John was just this guy who didn't want to carry anything. Literally or metaphorically. No pain. No gain. No drama. You do you and I'll do me. Occasionally meeting up at times with some type of carrier pigeon-type dialogue. Meeting up at Joshua Tree. A weird place he had for the weekend. Just the 2 of them and Drew's dogs. True father/daughter time spent. She really loved when he would share an anecdote about the Barrymore family. John made it seem so real. All of the Barrymores had passed away before Drew was born, so there was no dynasty upbringing. But, Drew could see why people took it that way.
Drew's grandfather was the great actor, John. He & Drew's great-aunt, Ethel & Lionel were the royal Barrymore family. Drew never knew any of them; but so badly wanted to. Drew was particularly fascinated w/ her grandfather. When Drew's dad would talk about his own dad, Drew would listen as if she was being let into a fairytale world, where danger lurked & magical things would occur. Drew would hear legendary stories of her grandfather: "Legend has it". Some through her grandfather's friends. As her dad was winding down and his days were numbered, Drew spent even more time at the hospice house with her dad. John was alone wanting it that way. Alienating everyone along the way. Drew, while her father getting care, was THERE & PRESENT w/ her dad. That role reversal where the child looks out and cares for the parent. He was able to look at his daughter and SEE DEEP into his daughter's eyes. She was perfection to him. Drew just took in the moment. Looking at her was his way of telling his daughter he loved her. John passed away a few months away.Out of the few possessions John had in his remains, Drew kept what she wanted and threw the rest away. A ceremony was planned where his ashes were flown around the Joshua Tree where John called home. There were times after his passing that Drew could sense & know that John was surrounding her. When someone passes and you can sense that those who've passed are still around you. To you alive, it's strange; but you KNOW it's them communicating with you from the beyond.
It's no secret that Drew emancipated herself from her mother at the age of 14. Jaid had lost credibility as a mother by taking her daughter to the ICONIC Studio 54 instead of to school. Drew was out of control due to working since 11 months of age and what had been done to her childhood, which made her grow up fast. Work had been a positive thing in her life, and it was sadly taken away because Jaid, in her way, ruined it for Drew. When people found out the outcome of what they seen, Drew sadly understood that. Drew was never unprofessional, but was put on a hiatus from being employable. When she turned 14 and wanted to start her life over again, she wanted to do things on her own terms.
Jaid was in FULL support of Drew's emancipation. She felt bad, but too much had happened. After the judge walked in, the day went into a blur for Drew. The judge said these words, which has STUCK w/ Drew: "I can turn the clock forward, but I can never turn it back. Are you sure you're ready for that?" Drew responded w/ a YES! She was then legally pronounced an adult. Mother & daughter hugged, knowing things would be different, but things were always too different, and that is why this needed to happen. At the age of 14, Drew walked out in the eyes of the court an 18-yr-old in the state of California. Next came the checklist that Drew needed to take care of as an adult.
1. An apartment in West Hollywood, where she grew up. Finding a place thanks to a friend, Justine.
2. A job. Since Drew was 2 years away from getting her driver's license, so she had to act global and think local. Inspired by Justine, Drew looked at the coffeehouse near them, the Living Room, which was one of the big L.A. hot spots at night. It was the start of the 1990s and coffeehouses were becoming a BIG thing. Drew wasn't great at it, but who is GREAT at that maturing age? Living on your own, can be quite scary within these times on your own. Somehow looking every night at the growing laundry pile was the thing really sent her over the edge. Staring at the massive pile of clothes, Drew knew she was ALONE! Somewhere in West Hollywood, Drew was very alone. She needed something to comfort her. Something safe. She opened a classic novel. Drew acquired and read herself to sleep.
Drew woke up the next day and she could her boss was patient with her learning curves, but was also irritated w/ her. He liked her and Drew had truly ruined some things. He had every right to be miffed. It was a situation where no matter where you turned . . . NOTHING could/would go right. Drew sat into bed waiting for daylight. This wasn't what she had in mind when she left the courthouse emancipated. Something had to give. Drew loved a self-improvement movie montage. So, she went into getting what she needed to be living on her own beginning with the BASICS. Making a mental list and finding ways to get things done with one foot at a time. Keeping mental checks of this/that. Putting pieces of a mental puzzle together. She was Michael Keaton in Mr. Mom before he figures it all out. Certain situations, as I would personally do myself, watch and learn from others. While confusing at first, but you get the hang of it. After the first time, Drew clearly needed a tutorial. She needed Justine to give her a lesson. Things were a revelation for Drew. Pretty soon she would look forward to being taught every Saturday. She didn't feel alone there. Learning to be domestic and having everything fall into place, Drew got so good at laundry that it became a point of pride for her. Falling in love with its process.
Once she finished reading the novel, Drew was excited to go to the bookstore and explore other authors, including ICONIC CLASSICS! Drew read EVERYTHING!
As Drew roamed the book isles, it HIT her that she dropped out of school. Once she was emancipated, Drew simply dropped out. Now what is she to do with her life? She didn't want to be uneducated. Now that she mastered laundry, what did Drew want to do now? What was her calling? So, she took & breathed in reading. Reading & books center her. Drew decided right-then-and-there she will not be defeated. Creating her own curriculum. And so she did just that! She read, cleaned & worked! Back at the coffeehouse, it was in the atmosphere that it wasn't her destiny. Drew quit that day. She worked on putting into motion of moving on. Drew wasn't scared anymore and was ready to move on! Even though it was only laundry, it taught Drew how to tackle everything; moving on & forward! (What would be similar to a lightbulb going off in your head and you're just ready to move the fuck on!)
After Drew took a deep look at her new baby girl, that she & her husband, Will Koppleman, decided on the name, Frankie. Her first daughter, Olive, was born independent and has given her mom that needy look to this day. Drew had felt so much emotional love for her daughter at first sight. Frankie looked like her grandmother, Jaid. Like Jaid, Frankie is also a Taurus in the astrological realm. Drew's biggest emotional trigger button in life is her mother. First time being a mother, Drew didn't really have that example to look after. Childhood reminisces reoccur that Drew never put to bed. Proof of an existence that quells Drew's worst fears. Mentally flowing through Drew that she was scared shitless that history will repeat itself. Also taking a bit after her mother-in-law, Coco, whom Drew loves & is in awe of, and a great example of a mother. Her maiden name is Franco, which was where Drew's daughter, Frankie's, name aspires from.
Around that time, Drew met "Nan", Nancy Juvonen, who would take Drew in like a sister and would become her partner in business. Changing Drew's entire world in so many ways. Nan is the replacement for the absence of family. A gift in Drew's life who is also a Taurus. They would articulate their visions when they started the company Flower Films. They wanted to tell stories of power-suit women. They were CONSTANTLY doing their homework. Reading & studying and building relationships w/ people they admired & respected. Creating a cozy, family-like environment at Flower Films. No matter what Drew & Nan through, they always come out stronger. They are within each others family. She was the family Drew never had until she created her own. And she still is. They made many films together including one where Nan met her husband, Jimmy Fallon; Fever Pitch. As a lover of journals, the best thing Drew could do was write. Kate Capshaw, another lady Drew loves, had gotten her a 5-yr journal after Olive was born. When Drew was a brand-new mother experiencing fear & worry, this gift from Kate was seen as a care package in her hand; thinking of what Nan always said to her. Drew had written in it every day of her life ever since, chronicling her daughter's lives and when their older to be a gift for them. (I can relate due to chronicling the milestones within my nephew, Jaylen's, life by having them all recorded on a video camera. )Nan and other great people have lifted Drew out of feeling helpless and given her power. Now Drew needs to pass this on to daughters. Drew vowed to pick herself up by her bootstraps and picked up her little Taurus baby. Kissing her babies over & over. Vowing to be their PROTECTIVE MOTHER and a warrior for her daughter. Being a MOTHER First!
In 1982, Drew was auditioning for a film Poltergeist. The producer was taking the auditions due to the director, Steven Spielberg, being unavailable. When Drew went in to audition, as any 7-yr-old would, she lied her little ass off. For a 7-yr-old, Pippi Longstocking was Drew's ULTIMATE hero. Her abilities made Drew feel there isn't you can't do if you put your mind to it. When she met Steven, the sky is the limit in Drew's mind. At first, he had told her she wasn't right for his movie, but she was right for another project he was doing. Drew knew he wasn't lying if she did get a callback. A few weeks later, Jaid got a call from casting directors for Steven's film. Back in to meet w/ him. After what she's done prior, what was Drew to do to win him over? Drew was very confident and precocious at that age. But that morning, at age 6, Drew was full of swagger. They all sat around observing and asking Drew questions. A kid wanting to win the job and go on an adventure. Jobs filled in what loneliness left. Drew wanted to make the best of it. Directing most of attention to Spielberg, due to him being the one buying it. As the decisions were being quietly made, Drew was scared all of a sudden. When you're left in your own quiet, you think of other outrageous summations.
Jaid had been working nights, but she thought Drew could be making money during the day. Beginning since Drew had been working at age 11 months old with commercials. Jaid was thinking Drew had no chance in hell at landing this gig and bringing in extra money for them. After being observed on Drew and her being a kid playing with a puppy, after solving a problem involving Drew, as everyone began to actually breathe again and Drew wasn't hurt, she got the job. And her budding commercial and TV movie career began. Right then, Drew quickly learned that this was a cattle call business when you win some/lose some. For those loses, those times are hard for a kid. Jaid would make her feel better with McDonald's or something that would. It explains why Drew associates healing pain with good food.
Drew was asked to come back and it be on tape this time. She was a hyper-imaginative kid with nothing to lose. And so Drew returned. Steven kept having Drew return multiple times. Each time Drew felt more like the Fonz and less like a scared kid. She felt excited and encouraged The final audition was to see if Drew could scream. Showing off her cocky side, when the tape began rolling and they were ready, Drew let it out. Screaming so loud she broke the device and the tape stopped. The room went silent. Steven smiled and that was it. A few days later, they got the call. Shooting would take place in a few weeks. Drew had gotten the job. Working for the next 3 months. Instead of trailers, they had bungalows. Schooling, under child labor laws, anyone under 16, 3 hours of school was REQUIRED and work no more than 9 1/2 hours. As an adult actress, it can be sorely missed when you're on hour 17 of the day and still working. When Drew's time was up, she was devastated until she was able to go again and join the other kids. |
| Steven Spielberg & Drew |
After months of silence on the film, they heard the name of the film was going to be changed to E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial. People were lined up around the block for this movie. Ones who did were full of joy and emotions. It was becoming a phenomenon. E.T. was breaking records. A worldwide freak-out!
From there, the wave of a world-tour began. Throughout her travels promoting E.T., Drew met the LEGENDARY ICON Princess Diana and was able to present her with an E.T. doll. Drew was in shock and awe. Steven Spielberg made sure Drew acted accordingly. The last leg of their tour was Japan. As kids would do, they would challenge Steven to do ridiculous pranks with them egging him on. Each country had a world premiere and each seemed crazier than the next. Something had crossed over and Drew's not-so-simple life would be less simple now. Nothing would be. But Steven & Drew's relationship would be the same. She had always tried to be her best in her eyes. Even through her TOUGH times, Drew was too embarrassed to face him; he didn't judge. Always supportive and caring.Drew TRUSTS him and still seeks advice from him to this day. Steven single-handily opened the doors for Drew with that one decision to put her into that film. It was her duty not to screw up the opportunity he gave her. Keeping her motivated to live her life the best that she can.
When Drew was 17, she was obviously on her wild streak. A reckless bull-in-a-china-shop in West Hollywood. Going on auditions while trying to revive her career, but not in any spotlight. In the late '80s & early '90s, you could fuck up and it be private. And no one cared. Everyone was in their own bubble. She loved hanging out with her best friends, one of whom was a roommate, sharing a house up on the hills. They were partying, taking it in and taking Polaroids. They were human Polaroids slowly developing into what people would see. They were kids in a rush to grow up. Drew would just tool around L.A. in her big Bronco going wherever the music had taken her. Nighttime is where everything would come alive. Basically waiting during the day. Drew's responsibilities were to make sure the car was full with gas and good music in the car stereo. Young dumbasses. What would be called today of too much havoc for a young age. Their behavior & maturity was like kids at a party in an '80s movie. Drew didn't have parents to shame her for her behavior, so she did that to herself. Whatever she did, Drew knew it came with regret later. The DEEP EMOTIONAL regret. That was the crux of her problem. Drew was still a kid with no guidance. She only had herself.That is why Drew feels so guilty when she was wrong. She is the only one who catches herself and makes a case to make it better. After a certain age, there comes a point where you can't keep doing what you're doing. Drew has reached it and time had come to make anew. Turn over a new leaf & life. I just can't keep doing this shit anymore.
A club in New York City called the Blue Angel was located in the lower East Side that Drew and her friends frequented. A dingy performance arts place with a small stage and soft lighting. Within there, Drew had given herself the name/nickname Lolita and jumped onto the stage. Drew felt like an old '60s movie go-go dancer in slow motion. Fitting into the dancing atmosphere. Drew was in a free state in her life, something she now struggles with being a mom herself. She has to be a grown-up now. She couldn't feel more passionate about being appropriate. She doesn't want to lie to her daughters about her past, but Drew is much more invested in telling them how she found her values. Drew had to discover for herself what was tasteful or not. She was in exhibitionist mode without thinking there was a term for it. She was just being. She was also playing characters from Poison Ivy to Amy Fisher to escape the child-actress stigma. That certainly changed the perception. Jobs started to roll in after the minor B-Movie level of success of those projects. After a few years, Drew may have gotten work, but she was also getting typecast.
Around this time, Drew had posed in an issue of Playboy. Steven Spielberg had sent it to her with a card sent for her to cover-up. Although she didn't know it at the time, Drew still had one more stunt to pull. It came after Drew created her Blue Angels character with a friend. This stint was the one seen live on television w/ David Letterman. What started out as laughing and a good time, Drew got the idea out of nowhere. Like a runaway train. She wondered how to up the ante and then things spiraled. Drew even shocked herself; What did I just do? It was a true moment of freedom for Drew. It got to be something fun rather than something wrong. Becoming a piece of show history. What was thought to be a crazy moment, Drew had really put it out there. After seeing it, right-then-and-there, Drew got a different perspective; this was an end of an era for her. She then began her journey of no sex scenes in movies, a modesty clause in her contracts, and a total lack of nudity in any public forum from there on out. And year-after-year, Drew became more uptight. Taking matters into her own hands. That was her past. Now there is her future. Drew wanted to be a good girl and goodness to be the theme of her life and work.
Drew had a long road in front of her, but she was ready to work on it. Whatever it took! Even if it meant creating a path for herself. That was when she came upon Ever After. A step in the RIGHT direction. The tale of a woman who rescued herself; unlike what we've been told. Drew fell in love with the story. Empowering her more than she ever thought. Believing things are one way; but making it her own. Drew wanted to rescue herself. She did. She became a lady. Taking time but making it happen. Be a warrior full of grace & class. Being free is about freeing yourself. Sometimes it takes seeing you in a different light to make you change and wake up!
The thing that was so revelatory about Flower, which began as a film company but became so much more, was that by creating it, Drew was also building a family. If it wasn't for those of the people at their company, nothing could get done. Drew has worked w/ Nancy Juvonen for more than 20 years on all of the films they've produced. Almost every morning begins w/ their partners over the phones. Drew couldn't honestly imagine her life without them. Mulitasking and GETTING THINGS DONE! Drew has learned so much about reaction, handling things and perspective. Drew and her team click & mesh well together. They may dream stuff up; but more importantly, they find ways of making things happen. They began in 1994 as Flower Films. They waited to produce movies. For 3 years, they weren't officially contributing; but they were allowed in the process on these 4 films; The Wedding Singer, Home Fries, Scream & Ever After. So they could really hearn how to do things w/ the greatest effectiveness as producers. An invaluable lesson.
They were then able to make their first film; Never Been Kissed and others that followed. They just tried to make stories that they really personally enjoyed & believed in. Letting the work speak for themselves. That was what mattered. Flower Beauty is a company Drew began that represents its name: Beauty. A company & statement that repesents what she's trying to pass onto her daughters. A company that is for women; by women. Coming with a POSITIVE message for her daughters.
Drew first met Adam Sandler in her early 20s. They met in a coffeehouse in Hollywood due to her insistence on meeting him. He was popular from his time on Saturday Night Live and his films; Happy Gilmore & Billy Madison, the latter of which was directed by Drew's friend, Tamra Davis. Drew was convinced at the time they were supposed to pair up. She just KNEW it. She thought Adam was different & unique and was drawn to his light. The stories she wanted to tell were about true love, chemistry and timelessness. Drew was convinced of them doing something together. When they first met, they looked like a preppy and a punk set up on a bad blind date. Drew told him she knew they were supposed to become a team. They discussed their strengths & weaknesses. He liked Drew's ability and a seed was planted. A follow-up was soon to come.
Adam told Drew he had the idea of a movie about a guy in a wedding band and their was a script. So Drew came on board, and they got Carrie Fisher to write the girls part to make it balanced. Things were able to be in order and they were off to make a movie; The Wedding Singer. A Blast Of Fun was made. Adam's friends, He & Drew played, partied, and became REAL, NO-BULLSHIT friends. When the film came out, they rented a bus and went around New York stopping & watching 5 minutes of the movie and onto the next stop; all the while dancing along the way. They could tell the movie was going to be a HIT! Drew wanted them to be like an old-fashioned movie couple. He was her cinematic soul mate. Many years later, they remained friends. They always talked about doing something again, but their lives had moved on in many ways; and they were not actively pursuing anything. But they were always looking for things as they read them. But for Drew, it would've had to TOP whatever they've done.
Drew sat down with her typewriter working on the Sony lot, making Charlie's Angels Full Throttle; typing nonetheless. As she wrote, the tears in her began to swell as she wrote about her history w/ this script. How long and why she loved it. Reinvigorating that she was supposed to have something to do with it. This film was worth teaming up for. Drew thought she & Adam needed to make more movies. After folding and hand-delivering the letter to his office, Drew anxiously awaited a response. Adam walked over from his office at Angels base camp. The project could be done, but turn it into a comedy without losing romance. They both know what each sex wants. From there was a working of Happy Madison and Flower Films. They immediately went into meetings to take this drama into a more comedic world. All of the same people they worked with on The Wedding Singer, Adam is loyal and consistent with his team. Just as Drew is with hers. They get how important respect is and they all love each other. Working and co-mingling with one another. Getting themselves into a working groove/process.
A few days into shooting, it was paradise and Drew just wanted to stay there forever. She has had a lifelong affair w/ Hawaii, but never had the opportunity to work there. Cameron came to visit wanting to escape a little. The 3 of them were together; meeting up at the end of the day. What became a visit turned into a vacation while on site. A fun, wholesome, communal moment in Drew's life that felt so safe. The message of the film was How do you make a love story? Drew chose the book Still Life with Woodpecker, just as her character Lucy reads daily, due to the book asking questions then goes on a wild ride just like the film. They decided to open the film on Valentine's Day, which is when they put The Wedding Singer out, so don't fix what isn't broken. Drew wasn't as carefree about the weekend and she was with that production. Weekends have become so important that is very stressful and lose some of the feelings of its purpose. Facing facts of the situation. Hold off onto the stressful hers until Monday. Drew wanted to be the weekend to be pure and for the movie to be what it is - a story. They made small talk, but the cloud of success or failure hung in the air like a giant thunderstorm that determines your day.
Drew knew by the look in Adam's eye that he knew what she didn't want to know yet. Adam informed Drew that broken $45 million, breaking records. They had all celebrated A series of perfect moments. Drew was relieved. Years later, they had met up again another 10 years later - 20 years total since The Wedding Singer. Adam has 2 daughters now, Sunny & Sadie, and Drew had her daughter, Olive. Family days together. A few months later Adam came upon Blended. Drew took Olive on safari almost every weekend and just made an amazing life experience and an adventure of it. Drew knew that her film life was winding down, and hours were so hard with kids. But with this group, the balance was there. Drew can be a mom and work because they celebrate their lives and kids. Making it very conducive to real life. A wonderful, family oriented time.All of the passion and drive Drew used to have toward movies was now dedicated to her kid. Drew was lucky enough to do all of this with old friends. At the end, they went to Georgia; living on a lake, which is Drew's favorite thing in the world. After work, Drew would go by herself and kayak, taking in her whole life. She would acknowledge how different she felt. As they were preparing themselves for landing after months of being together, they were on the last day of shooting. Adam & Drew made another movie hoping people liked. Drew was calm, content & happy. Then, she found out she was pregnant. A perfect moment to be introduced to the notion of her daughter, Frankie. After the film ended, Drew's new adventure began. When they met, Adam & Drew were basically kids. Now that they're in the same place again in their lives, completely different from where they began. Intermingling families and lives.
Family events with celebrations including business. They also like the idea and comfort of thinking of being together again. When they're together, business & whatelse; magic happens. It's as though you're being with certain people in your life and when you're together, time flies when you're having fun. Drew thought they could be a team, but what she found was a true partner. As great as you would want them to be!Drew learned the 2 most important things about acting by the time she was 6. From 1976-1983, while Jaid was trying to become an actress, they were hanging out with Lee Strasberg of the Strasberg Institute in L.A. Lee's wife, Anna, would become Drew's godmother, at Jaid's request. A relationship that would become so important to Drew due to her being motherly and helping to shape Drew for the next 7 years, mostly by allowing Drew to live in her home and feel safe. Anna always had what would be an open door policy. It was like a salon type of place. It was truly the most fluid creative energy Drew had ever seen in a house. It became a LIFE & home for Drew. A sense of family. This home formed her, but Drew wouldn't replicate it until years later. Anna taught Drew how to have a welcoming haven that she now has.
In 1979, Jaid was doing a play at the Strasberg Institute called Playing For Time about women in a concentration camp. Jaid was playing one of the women in the camp; they ended up giving Drew a small part as well. It was from what she seen there, Drew was in awe of the acting & emotion display every night. She didn't know how she did it. What was Jaid's ritual? So, Drew went in search for answers. What it takes to bring the ability to life? That place within yourself that you have to keep going to! After finding that, Drew spied on her night after night; watching her resurrect the pain and the emotions flow. Jaid gave herself fully to the performance.
1. Make it personal
The 2ND lesson came while on the E.T. set. Spielberg told her "Don't act your characters. BE your characters."
Throughout her career, Drew would play many facets of things she actually experienced in REAL life. It was cathartic and productive. The first film Drew did after E.T. was Irreconcilable Differences. Drew felt she had a lot to bring to that. The next role was Edie Beale, Jr. The older Drew gets, the deeper you have to go after being in one spot. Where does Drew go now? After a job comes along, Drew is on a mental roller coaster and can't get off. She begins relating it to her own personal experiences. She starts to see what she can do with it; getting territorial about it. Making it hers even though its the disguise of someone else.
Now its about telling the occasional story that Drew truly believes in and thinks it should be out there in the world. As Drew looks back, that crying woman taught her how to approach everything in life. Acting or otherwise. Be authentic & be yourself. Make it personal!At this point, Drew is engaged and is 5 months pregnant. On a particular Sunday morning, she thought to cook pancakes with a new recipe in an attempt to try. Cooking had become her latest obsession. Drew had traded going out to concerts and late night dinners for a stay-at-home lifestyle. Cutting out the teenage-like behavior in her 30s. She was settling down with her new garden and new cookbooks and trying to be a GROWN-UP! Drew thought that herb boxes & homemade meatballs were the gateway to maturity. She fantasized about being the woman who could whip up anything in her kitchen. Instead, Drew is almost stretched over cookbooks in an attempt to work out the kinks in spotty cooking. Reading and following recipe directions into making lemon ricotta pancakes. Looking back, a first time experience can be funny. Making due with what there is. After awhile, you're FED UP! FUCK IT! NOTHING CAN GO RIGHT!
Drew's fiance at the time, Will Koppleman, came downstairs to find Drew a mess. In a don't touch me! moment. Trying to help her out, that was the latest thing Drew wanted. He knew to give her the space she needed. Standing over the sink, Drew felt lost & stupid. You feel like you suck & the evidence was everywhere. Drew was DAMN DETERMINED to make this work no matter what! After multiple times, Drew got back up and kept trying. Will was trying to be supportive, but in that state . . . .a man should know better. As much as Will was genuine, Drew truly appreciates the NO, BULLSHIT, TELL ME STRAIGHT method. On about the 4TH one, Drew began getting it right. Size. Color. Taste. She was full of pride after the previous mess. All of a sudden, after Will enjoyed what he'd eaten, he wanted to go back and asked Drew what she put in them w/ a panicked look in his face. He had to bring them back up in the toilet due to them being cooked, but RAW. Domestic bliss is one thing, but a domestic goddess is one thing Drew isn't!
When Drew was going to have her daughter, Olive, she wanted to be READY! Beginning with a letter to her child to be! Starting with a heartwarming & TRUTH-TELLING HONEST motherly way of whats to come & happen; including what already has. What Drew wants & hopes as Olive's mother. Those moments you cherish as a parent as your child learns and grows. Sharing those moments that you had w/ your baby of what happened within the first year of their lives. As a first-time mom to a newborn, Drew was in a state where paranoia of making the wrong decision. A newbie of a mom. Scared shitless & nerve rattled of the wrong choice as a new mom. Included in the letter of what she sees now as of Olive as a child and who she is as a little girl: Olive Barrymore Koppleman.
Drew has a nickname: The Seagull. She stares at other people's plates w/ jealousy & curiosity. Her eyes are like lasers on a target to everyone's food due to being a child without a lunch at school; that Jaid would sometimes forget. Although Drew was fed at work, and it was an honest mistake on Jaid's part and an oversight. What Jaid lacked, others took care of. From preschool-2ND grade, at Fountain Day School, lunch was provided and pleasant. Harmony & order. This was a unified school where there was an even playing field. Drew felt safe there. It was her first experience with school, due to not having anything to compare it to. The first time Drew experienced the social settings & situation of school. The school environment affects so much of how we develop. Some are everlasting. Cut to the new format at the Country School in Sherman Oaks in the Valley; which was a dog-eat-dog world.Lunch became important, semi-defying the lunch box, or the brown bag. Outside defying your situations/lives. As Drew sat there, watching these kids, it reached a fever pitch in her life and truly affected her. Drew became The Seagull. Staring eyes. Hungry. Darwinian. Too prideful to beg and yet Drew had developed a swoop-in approach to get anything. If someone wasn't going to finish something, Drew would kindly ask for the remains. She found a way to survive. It built character. A power struggle we're all meant to have. Mayhem day-after-day for years. After all these years later, at every meal, even if she has food in front of her, Drew watches what everyone else has. This from her childhood followed into her adulthood. Drew still covets to this day and that's why her friend's still call her The Seagull. The good news is that at the end of the tunnel and the moral for Drew is that she will assemble her daughters' lunches with love, detail & precision. Learning from her past so history will not repeat itself.
Nan & Drew have always talked about driving across the country. Just taking off and going wherever they pleased. Wherever the music takes 'em. They discussed this fantasy for a few years . . . . until one night in 1996. Drew called her up late one night and they had finally put the money where their mouths are. Renting an RV in the morning and just going. Then the opportunity arose. They did just that! Their plan was to go from L.A. to Wolfeboro, New Hampshire, where Nan's family had a lake house. Literally going on the open road for 1 month - let the games begin. They packed their belongings and what they needed. Taking in what their surroundings were!
The only moves Drew had were kicking & punching. Something that would come in handy later; there comes Charlie's Angels. One day Drew would be a CoverGirl; then her own beauty business. While outgrowing some things, Drew could never shred her klutziness. She is just more aware of what to watch out for in her adulthood. She is now a willing woman at her fun, dancing abandon. Drew owns it. Dancing with complete abandon. The whole silly package.When she was 11-years-of-age, Drew went to Munich to make a made-for-TV/Christmas special called Babes In Toyland, shooting went on for months. In the film, lots of people in animal costumes were needed, so they hired a bunch of American teenagers from the local army base they could get reasonable money. It was the kids' summer break, so it worked out for everybody. Drew was thrilled to be around a bunch of teenagers who knew what it was like to move around and have an unorthodox life. 1986 heavy metal was the soundtrack of the summer and ones that color her memories. They would all make mixtapes for one another and share music. When she wasn't working, Drew would go to the areas where people would hang out & drink. That's what they did; sit around & get drunk. Creating HAVOC! This HAUNTS Drew now! Not only will she never forgive herself or chalk it up to being drunk; on-the-loose 11-year-old behavior with no adult supervision; but because, to this day, her clothes have a tendency to just disappear. Literally. Buy it one Wednesday and it's GONE a few weeks later.
During maternity with Olive & Frankie, nothing fit for 3 years, so to make room, Drew put them in storage. After feeling want for these things that were - VANISHED & GONE! You like what you see? Enjoy it while you can; because you won't get to again due to it being gone & disappeared.
Drew is a mother of 2 girls and is an extremely hands-on overachieving mom, and yet works too. She is also a wife. Never mind order. Anyone who is both knows order goes out the window. Things have to give if you really want to raise your kids due to it being all time-consuming. Inspiration was truly hard to get back after Drew had her babies because her focus was on them. After having Olive, work was on the back burner. Everything else didn't matter compared to caring for her children. She just didn't care anymore. It was both liberating and scary. Going from working her whole life to making a living to raising her kids. Then Drew pondered to ever want to work again. Dedicating herself to her kids the majority of the time. Having to go from mom Drew to working Drew gives the MOM GUILT! Drew would do any-and-everything for her kids.
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| Drew with her daughters |
Grey Gardens was a whole other commitment. In the movie, Drew shut out the world for 4 months in total isolation to become Edith Bouvier Beale, Jr. In Drew's performance, she was actually doing something that felt less juvenile & desperate. She felt there was something different. Drew was a woman who could take it or leave it. This female movie transcends & touches people. Vowing to make this film work.
Drew first met her maternal grandfather when she was 2 years old. His name was Shuni. He & his second wife, Marta, lived in Pennsylvania, where Jaid was from. Jiad wasn't born there due to being in a postwar displaced persons camp in Germany. That was where Shuni met Marta and left Jaid's mother to be happy with her. He wanted to be happy, so the family immigrated to Pennsylvania when they got out. From there, everyone went their separate ways.
Jaid's upbringing was very dark & bleak. Her mother was not kind and then was bitter from her life not going the way she wanted, taking it out on everyone around her. Drew didn't even know her name. The tension was thick in the air. However, Drew was so fond of her grandfather. She KNEW he was a good person. He was a stained glass maker. Jaid was good as well. Skipping a generation with Drew. Making her different. The skill with stained glass ran in their family with John & Lionel Barrymore.
After that trip, Shuni would come to Los Angeles when Jaid bought their first house in 1983. Life was extremely different; Drew had traveled the world and Jaid was taking Drew to the nightclubs, and Drew was working nonstop. She was different. She didn't feel like she was able to have spent much time with him. Drew had no idea of the father/daughter relationship between them. Jaid was very private about her own family and background. Drew was too young to grasp any of it.
Drew was becoming cynical and figured nothing lasted in her life. Her anger was growing and she was so confused. What ways she knew were so far away. She wished she could have spent more time with Shuni together. Drew figured there was a reason that no one was telling her and she let the mystery linger. Then one day, Drew got a phone call.Drew was 13 and living in an institution/rehab. Jaid just wanted someone to deal with her daughter. Drew's anger had taken over and she was out of control, so Jaid checked her in in the middle of the night. Drew felt trapped. So, she lived there for a year 1/2. While there, Drew received news from her mom that her grandfather had passed away. She burst into tears. Everyone else tried giving Drew her privacy. It was respectful. It was a hard-knock place to be. No Hollywood-type beachside rehab, but a psych ward deep in the valley. It was a make/break it type of place. A place where you accepted that and figured if you were going to make it or not. Drew was just another fuck-up dealing with pain.
As the years passed, Drew didn't know how to honor her grandfather. She only has one photo of him in a frame. She shows it to her daughters and tells them of this wonderful man. Drew only feels that what is within her control is her and others in the family spending time with her daughters. She lets her appreciation be known to them in the family. It is such a gift to her to finally have a family. Never taking it for granted. In those moments when she misses him, if Drew ever wants to visit Shuni again, she can mentally go back to that time. Reminiscing of what once was.
Drew met of Will Koppleman in 2008. Meeting at a friend's house and asking for her number, which Drew loved due men not doing that anymore. She was thrilled and waited 2 days for him to call. After dating for a few weeks, they truly had fun. At the time, it was not the right time/place. So, they drifted back into each other's lives and that was that. Getting to know him was a complete pleasure. She began getting worried about meeting someone due to feeling different than she ever had in her life. Then one night in 2011, Drew went out to a function with her business partner and then proceeded to go for a nightcap. While trying to get the attention of the bartender, when a man in front of her was blocking her way. After hovering and apologizing for being in this man's space, Drew realized it was Will. She shyly looked down. Something had changed right then & there. There was something about him that Drew KNEW he was a good person. Even after the "audition training"; underneath Will TRULY is a GOOD person. The feeling in the air was obvious. After finding out of his single status, timing wasn't really an issue anymore.
They went out on dates that were fun, comfortable and NO games. Things were falling into place. They excelled throughout their relationship. Drew loved that Will was classy and could hold intelligent conversation with people and was consistently wonderful. After being one & comfortable with herself, Drew worried about her own sense of self after becoming a "we". Just like everyone when they settle down, Drew began to examine every little thing. She began to love the feeling/environment of what would be her future in-laws. A FAMILY ENVIRONMENT. Drew was enveloped in it. The love and what would possibly be in the future for her & Will. As you age, you began to see what it is exactly what you want as a mate. When asked, Drew wondered about how do you know? She had panic in her eyes. Drew, like everyone else, began to overthink about it. A simple piece of advice laid it out for her: "Go with what your heart tells you and there you will have your answer". Similar to Let's Make A Deal; pick Door Number One. Right then & there; Drew had her answer. The best advice she was ever given. |
| Billie Holiday |
Drew isn't stupid, she knows & can feel what the future will hold with 2 teenage girls, but she can handle it. She was built for it. Teaching her daughters to be outside of their bloodlines. To be grateful, humble & polite. That means ALOT to Drew. To be a MOM to Frankie, just as she is to Olive.
When Nan came to Drew about the pitching idea for Charlie's Angels from Sony, Drew was on edge since Never Been Kissed due to deals dropping like flies, which was a bad sign for a production company. Taking on a great movie seemed like her plate was full, but she was up for the challenge. The studio wanted to make the movie come ALIVE! Eventually, they went in, pitched the movie and the world they wanted to create, the tone - everything. The idea was and the deal was on! Doing it their way. Their writing, their work, their casting. Casting Cameron, finding their 3RD angel, Lucy, find & stock Bill Murray to meet in person, wrangle & convince Crispin Glover to play the villain. Having your ducks in a row. So on and so forth. When Marie Claire suggested the angels go to Outward Bound due to a great story to publish and publicize the film, they all went for it.After working on it for well over a year, Drew was burned out and stressed. Mentally overwhelming and overthinking matters. Out of nowhere, she, Cameron & Lucy were hiking 40 miles without food or leisure. Just their backpacks. How in the fuck did Drew get herself into this? All of a sudden, Drew was solo. Her whole vibe sucked. A whole toxic energy. The experience was bonding them. It was hell for Drew, but others were out to enjoy this. She was the least athletic of them all. Drew could pretend to be a bad-ass, but in this case, there was no faking it. She had gotten too real for her and she was pissed. When you're in this state, you kind of want to say a Fuck You to this guide and its instructions. Walking for 5 miles that night. Once the dark had set in, it got to a point where you want to kill & murder the the good girl ass-kisser to the leader. There comes a point where REALITY hits everyone, including the ass-kiss. There was no sleep to be had AT-ALL! They barely spoke a word. It was just to get things done. When the chipper people first wake-up w/ their bright attitudes, Drew's anger boiled up again. Beginning back up on the trail again. Drew was draggin' ass and muttering under her breath once again.
Now even with hunger. It begins where hunger fuels hatred to the world. Scales were tipping from sanity-to-insanity. You stop listening to anyone. Getting to be truly within the earth. Being one with Mother Nature without Father Time. Drew, Lucy & Cameron were a team with Drew being a drag ass. The dead weight carcass. Every one made their way down with delight. With bumps in the road with activity, Drew watched from afar as the group bonded. Lucy caught a fish in the river with her bare hands. Everyone gave their gratitude. Reinvigorating their team spirit and can do attitude, Drew felt like she was alone in her feelings of seething furiously. Making her wonder what made her feel this way? Although 25, it felt like a midlife crisis. Drew had an enormous amount of stress and no way/ability to filter it in a healthy way. She was feeling like she was going back to being a little girl who was never taught to handle things in life. But there's no crying; you pick up and move on!
Drew once again had to find that epiphany. Pick up, apologize & get back into one's good graces. She was once again finding her way back. Feeling in a rut, Drew felt this was something she had to fix this. She rejoined the group and felt like a bad dog. That night, Drew softened to where things would commence as they were before. Making her way back in. The next day, they hiked and made their way up to a beautiful river. Then came time to make a fire w/ the bow friction route. Drew chose the latter too. Within 30 minutes others had fire and went on accordingly. Drew had to keep herself motivated "keep going; you can do it" type of salute. 3 backbreaking hours later, still no fire. Her scrapped hand was bleeding and she was straining out the last of her tears. She was FUCKING DETERMINED to get this fire LIT! Her inner voice on HIGH Speed Dial. DO NOT GIVE UP! She was her own personal drill sergeant. Drew was going at a furious, out-of-body state. She kept pushing. . . until sure enough there was smoke. Then it was a mission. After finally coming together, HARD WORK paid off. Everything had to be taken away when she was 13; losing her job, her credibility and her freedom and had to rebuild everything. But like with the fire, Drew didn't give up. It may not have been done with grace, but she fought her way into something better and more enlightened. Her lesson was to NOT give up. You Hold On TIGHT to what you've got. A lesson Drew never forgot. Drew was changed & recharged. Keeping her promise to herself. After getting home, they made a beautiful success out of the film. She was once again relieved. More importantly, Drew had more growing up to do where she needed.
In 2004, Drew was making the film Fever Pitch. It was a really happy time. She was enjoying reading The New York Times when she came across an article that headlined Children Line Up To Get Into Classroom. It was accompanied by the children. It could not have been more contrary to the look Drew seen in the classroom in her own experience. The kids wanted to be there. As she read on, it had to do with the fact that the World Food Program was providing meals. Breaking Drew's heart. She couldn't have felt more humbled at that moment. She was overwhelmed with empathy and curiousity. Something moved inside to the point where she went home, picked up the phone only to realize she had no one to call.After calling those she worked with, Drew began to put a plan into motion. She presented herself more of a volunteer who wanted to learn. NOT a celebrity who wanted a photo op. This was Drew. A tiny human trying to educate herself on how their program functioned. One year later, Drew got the call from Marie Claire magazine. They heard Drew was somehow interested in going to Africa, and they had a contact at the UN. If Drew would write an article about her trip, they would help her get there. They were her liasion and her funding.
This trip had turned out to be life changing. Having felt like she truly experienced. Drew wrote her article assignment all the way home as she had ample time and wanted to write while still being fresh off of the experience. After being home a few days, Drew was amazed at how much abundance is available to those in this U.S. Country. She began to feel guilty after entering a grocery store. Feeling guilty and completely disoriented. Changing her in a way where you don't see things the same. Forever stuck in your memory/subconscious to where you can't shut it off. After a few weeks of wondering around, Drew was proactive again and began calling the U.N. flying on a return trip. This time, Drew was on a mission with a plan in motion. GETTING THINGS DONE! Africa was Drew's wake-up call. Something Drew will be FOREVER GRATEFUL for.
After Will & Drew had been dating for only a few months, it was her maiden voyage into his parents house; which Will lived in as a child. Taking in the environment. A TRUE Family home. Undeniable warmth. Drew studied this environment that was foreign to her. a close-knit family. Drew was taking it all in, piecing them together like a puzzle to understand her boyfriend's life. This whole like of togetherness felt intimidating. She felt her West Hollywood urchin kick in. Inner voice saying she didn't belong. Will's parents had been married for 39 years with 2 kids. Good people. When Drew met them, it felt like the biggest audition of her life. Although they were dating for a few months, the girl in Drew felt she had to be a grown up. Drew could SEE a life with this man. It was new, but the stakes felt high.
Drew's heart was pounding from anticipation. Fearful of the tag that came with the in-laws. She took a deep breath and before she knew it, Will's mom, Coco, was extending herself and hugging Drew. Afterward from being welcomed, Drew began to untense and turn into a grateful girl who didn't feel judged. She had the preconcieved notions of what/how they would view her. What began as a double date and getting to know one another, it was an absolute dream of an evening. That night, Drew truly feel in love with not just Will, but his parents. Helping to clarify what Drew felt in her heart. She was thinking about family as well. She had to think with her head, not her heart. She vowed to take SERIOUSLY the decision to have a child. She came from a blueprint of what NOT to do and wouldn't even consider having children until she had the tangible antidote due to her own upbringing.
After an old-fashioned meeting with the parents, Drew & Will took off; traveling the world for a year. They went everywhere from Austin to Africa. Hawaii was Drew's favorite. Renting a house, cooking & hiking. Drew slept PEACEFULLY. Taking a trip to New York where Drew met his family. As they were planning their wedding, Drew seen the Koppleman's what would become of the family she missed out and never had. For the first time, Drew is part of a family. In the lottery of life, Drew hit the in-law jackpot. A really BIG one. FAMILY!
Remember this:No matter where you are or how old you are; age is just a number.As of this books publication, Drew and Will have since separated/divorced after 4 years of marriage.
