Waypoints: My Scottish Journey

 This book, which begins the journey of 2023, is one that ventures on the arduous trek of one BEAUTIFUL Scottish man's journey across the West Highland Way to a metaphor of a story to who he is TODAY! While this book tells of his journals/adventures, it also tells of his PERSONAL story of GROWING UP to be one of the stars that had to find out who HE is. This is the story of a man who took his life and LEARNED from it. Here are those lessons from Outlander's own, Sam Roland Heughan.

When Sam walks into a room, the first thing people notice is how open his face is. Nervous, alert and open to the world, trusting. The formality and potential stress of the encounter - a director auditioning an actor for their professional first theatrical role - has not dimmed his eyes or upset his equilibrium. But, for the most part, the audition process can be a grueling one, especially for the actor. You naturally withhold a part of yourself out of self-presentation. An armor with a cloak of silent charm. The more difficult the challenge, the more we show who we are when we rise to it. This includes the foreboding unforgettable end of Season 1 of Outlander. The reality of the return journey distorts the memory of the outward as a breeze. Sam has come a long way to be here! A creative urge can take people in various directions. While visiting a cabin, Sam is taken in by its majestic surroundings. Along with his brother, Cirdan, and the female cabin owner, they toured the location. Among the tour when left alone, Sam marvels in HISTORY of where he is. As he moves closer to a stack of shelves, interested in what he'll find, only to register not a book or a DVD that is all too familiar with him. Aside from the films, Sam runs his fingers along the side of books. He didn't have to go far to find a library copy of the first title in a series that is soon to be adapted for television. For which Sam has read them ALL! There is a little weight to it, as if it's just a prompt for a response. Little did Sam know, he held the key to his future before returning the book before he was caught. 

Sam loves being busy. But by rights, he should be happy loafing in sweats doing absolutely nothing. But, he can't seem to shut his mind off. He feels restless. He can't sleep at night; only a doze throughout the day. What feels like quiet downtime feels like  a dull blur. After 2 cups of coffee, Sam is able to take in the day. Sam is annoyed with himself due to looking forward to a well-deserved break. He craves downtime, but he feels guilty if he's not grafting and pushing himself in some capacity. With the world changing and the season taking a harder undertone, while it was shorter, it left Sam feeling wiped, worn & exhausted. Looking forward to his break of the show's hiatus. During the height of the pandemic, Sam dwelled on how much it had touched every aspect of their lives. Sam had only just returned to Scotland, leaving finished work on a movie with Celine Dion called It's All Coming Back To Me. With mask quarantine and separation for safety, along with the slush and melting snow surrounding. . . Sam felt another challenge arise. Whenever Sam was away from the camera, he would find himself drawn to the views of his atmosphere. In Jamie's tattered wardrobe, Sam would take in his surroundings off-camera.

So, on the last day of the shoot, Sam arranged with another actor who shared his love of running up to get UP long before their call time and lace up a pair of shoes to trail. The cold air breeze woke Sam up as they jogged the land. They were beginning to find their stride, but mostly Sam was focused on his feet due to the reluctancy to real-off excuses. The West Highland Way was on Sam's to-do list. The opportunity handed itself to him, quite literally and yet Sam always seemed too busy to do anything about it. But, ironically Sam loved being outdoors. He had even founded a charity dedicated to encouraging people to take in challenges and enjoy happy, healthy lives. Yet, Sam was embarrassed that he hadn't put his money where his mouth was and walked his own country's trails.

As much as Sam liked to make mischief, it was still very early on the trip. This took place around the last day of the hardest season of shooting the previous season 7. Sam's heart lifted and he was excited to escape the COVID protocols and the tough schedule that had dictated the days, weeks & months of the shoot. By the time they arrived back at the hotel, Sam had just enough time for a quick shower to get back on the road to Hollywood.

The final day of shooting was just as intense as any

other. The last scene to film was to open the season. Sam wanted to return to a semblance of normalcy on his motorbike. He could be lax and unwind at home. With no commitments for a week, Sam planned to do absolutely nothing. He decided to celebrate by taking the long scenic route waving goodbye to his location as he passed. Sam then studies the route on the map to his next destination. Scribbling on scrap paper, Sam attempts to calculate his destination. Due to his workout regime, Sam is in good shape physically along with the occasional run, and blind optimism. He has a short time-frame to do it but it can be done. Sam never knew where the opportunity would arise again.  In that moment. . . .he HAD TO GET SHIT DONE! and SMASH IT OUT! He hadn't properly camped out since his cub scout days. (He loved collecting the badges.) Having made a rash decision, he knew he would have to act fast. Not only does he intend to act fast, it would be the REAL deal.

From the moment Sam started browsing, he felt completely unprepared. After gathering his belongings that he would need, he finally navigated his way to the counter for the simple reason he couldn't carry more. That evening, having returned home confident that he would have what he needed, he laid out meticulously to prepare himself both physically & mentally with his own checklist of sorts. As he put himself to bed, mental anxiety plagued him. Considering what he does for work on Outlander, he is set to become Sam The Wanderer. In his mind, Sam had cooked an epic odyssey. Little did he know, it rained a relentless rainstorm outside, he wondered if he should cancel it all and ask for a refund. 

Sam Roland Heughan was born on April 30, 1980 in the county of  Dumfries & Galloway. Sam recalls a memory where he is halfway on the stairwell of the cottage he lived in his first few years of life. The separation of his parents in other rooms in the same room. . . living together but not together affected his ENTIRE form of being. He recalls feeling torn. Despite having his parents part company when Sam was only 18 months old; he experienced only love. They only had 2 sons; Sam's older brother, Cirdan & Sam. Their dad was a huge fan of The Lord Of The Rings, naming Cirdan after one of the characters. Sam's mom had a treasured special edition that read over-and-over again. He was enamorately in love with the book series. It felt like reading a spellbook from the series. Sam, himself, was adventurous who could also be quite sensitive. Leading the charge when left to his own devices, but in company Sam prefers to not be the FOCUS of attention. He observes from the sidelines. When Sam was 18 months old, his father left and never came back.

As Sam grew up and moved on to his surroundings and the people in it, Sam became aware that their mother did everything to create a family for Sam and his brother. With what the world had done, their mother buried herself into her boys. As a family of 3, the Heughan family settled into HOME of New Galloway.  A courtyard with a strong community atmosphere. People left their doors unlocked. They looked out for one another. it was a network and it felt calm having been built on trust. In the wake of his dad's departure, they valued that. Sam was truly surrounded by families in some ways. Sam's may not have resembled them, or the kind he saw on their black-and-white TV, but he NEVER felt anything was missing. His mom made sure of that. With what the atmosphere of Scotland gave...plenty of room for imaginary play.  While today, Sam would like to be invisible in the crowd, he'd HATE to be that guy who disappoints.

When Sam was growing up, there was a difference of 5 years between he and Cirdan. Sam looks up to Cirdan to this day. In some ways, due to the age difference, Cirdan was like a father figure to him. CIrdan has always been very practical. One whom always worked with what he had at his disposal was a quality Sam really admired. Sam wanted to work with his hands and could never quite perfect it like his brother. Cirdan's experience of their dad's departure was very different from Sam's. Cridan was aware of what happened, with Sam having no memory growing up of life with parents. Cirdan KNEW their dad; but Sam only knew a voice on the phone on his 10TH birthday. Sam often asked about his dad, but his mom pressed on, while Cirdan just ignored the subject. He could be incredibly nonchalant and chill, but Sam seen it was a protective mechanism. It FORCED Sam to DEAL with the emotions of family life. Sam KNEW his mom was on-the-go and he wanted to help. There was only so much a young boy could do. It certainly left Sam feeling the need to please people.

Cirdan & Sam

Living in the heart of the Scottish countryside, Sam & Cirdan certainly made the most of being outdoors. They both loved to fish. Sam would try to tag-along with his brother whenever possible. Sam wasn't cut out to deal with one practicality. He could deal with the fish. . .not the removal of it. Sam's mom was great at making sure her son was CARED about on his own device; food. . .etc. Unwilling to hurt any living thing, Sam would fish out to take in his surroundings and QUIET! He didn't have to deal with reality and he adored it. In some ways, it was Sam's first taste of acting. It allowed him to be himself by pretending to be someone else. 

In school, Sam had 4 friends that summoned the total of kids in his year group. The situation in its entirety focused on 20 kids. On weekends, they'd hang out the way they couldn't on the schoolyard. For a kid, Sam was creating a family in his friendships. Sam had this one friend - Annie - whom Sam grew up with since infancy due to their mother's friendships. They, Sam & Annie, grew up together in many ways, including each other's first kiss when they were 10 on a game of pure experimentation - then they were just back to being damn good friends. Even as Sam's feelings for the opposite sex grew stronger; he didn't have much confidence in himself. Sam was very tall for his age. At a time when everyone is getting to grips with their identity; it made Sam feel like he stood out for the wrong reasons. Sam had poor eyesight. His mom couldn't afford proper glasses with no insurance, so he wore a NHS pair with thick lenses. He was so self-conscious that he couldn't make himself wear them in school. As a result, Sam couldn't read the blackboard for anything. Content with his friends, Sam was cool with hanging back. Occupy the outside edge. Although his eyesight wasn't good, it meant he could listen & take notes.

On one occasion, towards the end of school, Sam found himself the victim of a school bully with nowhere to hide. Just a kid asserting his authority. A rowdy, confident kid with Sam minding his own. All this kid did was shove Sam into a locker. Enough for him to respond - unaware of his own strength - Sam threw his bully into the urinals. Immediately apologizing, the kid looked at Sam, bruised & shocked. At first, he thought the kid would come at him vying for a fight. Instead, the kid grinned at Sam as if he missed out on a joke, from there a friendship formed. That kid never picked on anyone else again. Sam even trusted the kid to pull out a wobbly tooth for him, which Sam pocketed for later. Sam's not really on touch with any of his old classmates; but nothing can take away the times that would define him for always moving around. As an actor, it was something Sam adapted to. It was the catalyst that made it hard for Sam to put down roots. Sam never had friends like the ones he had in this age bracket of time... Does anyone? 

Picking a path through his teenage years, Sam began to see life with more clarity. It wasn't just growing up and confronting feelings, and the needs of people around him, it was more of the fact that Sam was wearing contact lenses. After years of feeling too awkward to wear his glasses, Sam's mom took him to the optician for an alternative. The contact lenses felt like a revelational miracle cure. They literally changed the way that Sam sees the world. It didn't change his confidence, but his vision prior was a contributor for why he held himself back. By the time Sam wore contacts, the place where he kept to himself became second nature to him. His contacts not only allowed him to see but SEE the world. Sam felt like a late starter in life, but one with a newfound confidence and attention to detail. Shortly after his life came into sharper focus, at an age when Sam & Cirdan were coming into their own, their mom applied to art school through the Edinburgh College Of Art.

Having devoted herself to her boys, the time had come for their mom to find and pursue her first love once more. It was such a thrill for his mom to learn she was going to be studying fine art. It also allowed them to move from their rural home to the bright lights for a big city. Off to a whole new world they went. It was a big change for these young boys; but also very exciting. Sam had just finished middle school and on his way to high school at the rate of his peers. It was overwhelming to begin from scratch, but without the dreaded spectacles. Sam began to make friends and make himself comfortable in a crowd. James Gillepsie's High School was run with anarchy and very strong on rules & discipline. With chaos around, as a boy who was happy. . .just happy to fit in, rather than stand out in a crowd, Sam had his head down and studied hard.

Sam never liked to get in trouble with authority, even if it was invited. Mostly, Sam avoided the warnings and reprimands. On one occasion, Sam came close to getting in trouble from the TOP! He was given a badge in school perfect; which Sam didn't that included theft of milk carton that Sam was supposed to dole out. It was the first where Sam was tested to hold his nerve and tell belivable bullshit story. Ultimately, it taught Sam that it was possible if he delivered with conviction. Sam only spent a year at this school due to his mother wanting him to explore his artistic side. Sam was pitched on the idea that he might thrive on a steiner education. He went for a week and never looked back. Instead of feeling trapped in a school, Sam felt relaxed & liberated. There was no uniform; so Sam wore jeans and tie-dyed T-Shirts. Even then, Sam was cool and tried to fit in with artistic kids. He also wanted to make an impression on young ladies; who seemed smart, sophisticated & grown-up. Steiner kids really did seem different, open, kind & inclusive. With his boldness, Sam was able to make friends quickly. After a while Sam could be himself, as everyone else. Sam was never a loner. . .he was always more contained. Now, he has friendships that continue to this day. Thanks to his mother, this new school felt like a second home.

Aside from standard lessons, they did everything from sketching to sculpting and more. They were encouraged to punish themselves for their misbehavior. Best of all, the school encouraged students to express themselves. As someone who felt content with standing in the wings of life. . . suddenly Sam was in the spotlight and it blew him away. The stage was the last place Sam thought he would be comfortable on stage. To his surprise, he was just completely lovedrelaxed. Why? Because playing a role is being in someone else's shoes. When you're in character, it allows you to express what you normally wouldn't everyday. . .And Sam loved it. He KNEW he had ALOT to learn; but performing felt like a calling. One of the first plays Sam got involved with was Moliere's The Prodigious Snob; a satire on social status where Sam was the lead. In the first performance, Sam hit his marks, delivered his lines and went with every emotion & impulse. Sam felt free and alive, with no restraints. What he didn't expect was the audience response. They laughed in the right places, which was an incredible feeling. Like Sam had a connection with these people. They were in this together. As the play progressed, they were FOCUSED & intent. . .And that was when Sam completely forgot his lines. Completely going blank for a minute before a prompt snapped him into REALITY! Chalking it up to an amateur moment that Sam will NEVER FORGET! A first . .  but certainly not the last time it would happen. Sam was a young teenager whom found this calling. A passion Sam cared about. Just as Cirdan found his calling on a bicycle, Sam found his on the stage. He enjoyed it, and crucially he didn't suck at it. He had alot to learn. . .but that was the basis of its appeal.

With the spark ignited, Sam's mom encouraged the flame by taking him to see plays at a theatre in Edinburgh. Money was still tight, but the theatre offered free preview nights. Tickets for a small fee that lasted for 2 matinees. Sam found himself transported by the STORY unfolding before him onstage. He loved the darkness, as if the world shut down for these moments. The moments of what were happening before him infixed a young Sam. It allowed him to see the inner workings of what his future would hold as an actor. A chance to see behind Oz's curtain if you will. Appreciate and take in what Sam was seeing. Moments that would transport the audience to another time/place. 

During his teenage years, Sam would see multiple plays in the making. His favorite was the Scottish version of King Arthur called Merlin. . .working it to their style. Sam was completely blown away. It was so passionate from beginning to end. Sam was in wandering amazement.

By then, Sam had seen enough plays to know that his heart skipped a beat when the curtain opened. Sam was completely captivated from start-to-finish. The theater had become a playground for these moments. A safe place to express his emotions/himself. He loved spending time there. So, when Sam spotted a part-time vacancy for an usher, he jumped at the opportunity. For a teenager with a love of theater, it was the perfect job. Sam's shifts were in the evenings/weekends, so they fitted around school. It was his dream environment, so it never felt like work. No matter the tedious and repeat showings, Sam was always captivated. No matter the production, Sam was just happy to be involved.

Aside from working, Sam enjoyed the accompaniment of his friends. Riding bikes, playing video and board games. Fantasy was the genre that bonded them. The genre of video games enriched Sam's interest in theater. Even so, Sam lacked the confidence to set his sights on drama school. Nor was he convinced that acting was his path. Instead, as one term led to another, Sam found himself applying to universities that hosted his passions. Academically, Sam did enough to get by. English was where his flourished; but he drowned in Math & Science. Coasting by to get the courses he needed to pass, hoping it would follow everyone else into higher education. It came as a relief when the University Of Aberdeen offered Sam placement on their English  & Film studies degree. Sam wasn't really into it. Once the excitement dimmed, Sam began to question his life's choices. So, having deferred from school, Sam left school intent on spending the next year figuring out his life's purpose. It truly was an exciting moment to try to find his true identity after the fact.

With school officially behind him, Sam joined his core group of 4 friends to go travelling for REAL adventure. First, they visited Lativia & Estonia, staying in brickhouses and drinking in cheap bars. From there, they decided to venture across the Russian border to check out St. Petersberg and get some culture. They had all the correct documentation, but they were heading out of their comfort zone. Any uneasiness Sam felt, disappointed when he was chatting up the bravado with the other lads. They occupied a 4-person compartment in the train carriage, chatting & laughing while taking in the chili & cold atmosphere outside that represented their childhoods. Sam tried to put the coldness behind his train of thought as they settled for the night; only to find himself in what felt like a Cold War movie. The sound of the atmosphere in the train disturbed their slumber. A soldier entered their compartment, shining a light in their faces and shouted aggressively in Russian. 

During the ticket inspection, Sam felt terrified! Blearily, they rose to their feet to retrieve their papers. Sam kept his in his backpack, which he stored in the overhead storage bin. As his turn came, Sam reached for it, only to dislodge one of his boots, which Sam stuffed his paperwork in the boot. The boot came down before he could grab it, hitting the soldier square in the face. Sam's face/eyes were in horror with him being completely horrified, the soldier didn't even blink. He just waited for Sam to present his papers. 

This time, Sam retrieved his passport and ticket. As he tried to gather himself, Sam glanced down. To his horrific dismay, seen the Swiss Army knife he carried with him. In a rush of packing, Sam FORGOT he had it on his person. He was TERRIFIED for his liberty. Without hesitation as the soldier acclaimed the visa stamps in his passports, Sam tried to kick the knife from himself. As he did so, the soldier looked at Sam and glowed. He only broke eye contact with Sam when another object dropped out of Sam's property, which Sam still uselessly held back. It was truly with him as part of a gagging joke. A stuffed lion that fell onto the floor saved Sam's ass. The soldier returned Sam his documentation, then silently cursed him out. Nobody dared to correct this man. Better to alleviate trouble after this encounter. Within minutes, as the train resumed its journey towards St. Petersberg, they were joking about the incident. A moment that forever stays with Sam. Despite his career path, Sam is the type of person to stay under the radar. A moment with reality did little to pursue Sam that he should dare to dream.  

Apart from a couple of minutes of sheer terror in a train sliding outdoors of St. Petersberg, Sam truly enjoyed travelling with his friends. An adventure he didn't want to end. Sam went back home feeling flat wondering how he would spend his days of the year. Within a short time frame, Sam was running low on his savings from the theater and was on a plane bound for San Fransisco. Sam had just turned 18. For a young man raised in the English countryside, America was the promised land. He had caught the travel bug from his first adventure by railroad. This time, Sam planned to explore the U.S.A. like those have done in the movies. On the first day, Sam left the hotel where he was staying so he could lay eyes on the Golden Gate Bridge. From his viewpoint, Sam stayed there for hours, listening to his cassette tape of Otis Redding on repeat. In the city, Sam tasted his first of Mexican food, feeding himself with Que ricos tacos. 

As the days & weeks passed, dreaming became central to Sam's traveling experience. Sam was alone with his thoughts, reflecting on his future and constantly on the move. Sam had very little money, but felt like he was living the American dream. What money Sam was living on was about to trickle out, and he knew it was time to head home. Sam figured he would go to University with no enthusiasm. He was talking with his friend about Sam's interest in acting and theatre, and his hopes that an English & film studies degree could touch about it.  His mate gave Sam the pep talk of encouragement Sam needed to go for it. After finishing his beer and reflecting on his advice and going their separate ways, the next chapter in Sam's life became clear in his mind.

Sam is a Tauren. Born at home under a full moon. According to his mom, Sam's parents had a friend who read the ephemeris and seen GREAT things for Sam. His star sign indicates that Sam's bullish, stubborn, dedicated & determined. Sam, himself, is the opposite, although considering himself to be highly competitive at heart. Unlike many of his friends, Sam had no real passion for football. He just never engaged with it. Outside of being a spectator of watching rugby, team sports were never for Sam. He has always strived to do his very best. Set himself for high standards and then somewhat push himself if he failed to meet the mark. The closest Sam came to was judo. Sam was a club member for years. During his time at the mat, Sam worked his way up. The judo taught him to fight hard for the position, rewards that came with hard work & commitment. A skill that steered him through his early attempts to break into acting as a career.

Declining the university offer, awaiting the end of a gap year, Sam had his heart set on drama school. A degree in English & Film Studies just wasn't enough for him. At first, acting seemed like a constant idea in passing. Now, it was time to put his plan into motion. Sam waited to dazzle in what he learned...but, by then, Sam was committed and darted to his future. In terms of timing, Sam had missed his window of opportunity to apply to drama school for the next academic year. To Sam's great surprise, and also delight, one school in Glasgow; The Royal Scottish Academy Of Music/Drama offered Sam a chance to overlook the standard operation procedure and audition privately. The school was ran by someone Sam DEEPLY admired; Vladimir Miradan. The thought of learning from this man with a formidable mastery of acting, psychology filled Sam with high excitement and dread. Immediately, Sam felt out of his depth, but attended the audition all the same. And it was a disaster. Sam's instincts were right. The opportunity to try out in front of Miradan was incredible. Sam didn't have enough stage experience to leave an impression. He was nervous. He stumbled over his lines. He could NOT connect with the character. He winged it to the best of his abilities, which didn't amount to much. Sam knew by the end of it; he had blown his audition. Sam was advised to work on it and try again the following year. So, for the next 12 months, Sam spent as much time on a stage as he could.   

Sam had failed to get into drama school, but that served to incentivise him. Sam was quite prepared to compete with himself. He needed to prove that he could do it. So, giving his spot in school, Sam set his sights about doing everything he could to be a student of the great Vladimir Mirodan. Sam joined the local theater with really creative people both onstage and behind the scenes. Tutors became friends. They would sit after workshops drinking spicy Rum & Coke chatting and bonding with one another. It helped Sam to feel like he was moving in the right direction. Making lifelong friendships with various students. It was inspiring to be involved in productions on the main stage. Sam was hungry to learn and improve at all times. Sam fell for a girl in his class and wanted to impress her. He was infatuated. Sam looked forward to going to acting lessons and would arrive early/stay late hoping to catch her eye. In some ways, Sam's rejection from drama school was a humbling experience. It fed into his desire to improve himself with hard work & dedication.

In order to fund his year out, living at home with his mom after Cirdan moved out onto his own place, Sam found work in Edinburgh as a manager at an internet cafe called Cyberia Sam's shifts were as busy as they were entertaining. Sam's customer care skills tested his rudimentary know-how. In his downtime between shifts, Sam and his friends would compete in online gaming and hang out in chat-rooms. Sam loved the alternative universe and characters online. 

Later, Sam switched jobs to become the duty manager at an unconventional cafe; Ndebele. It boasted great African food and Sam loved the sense of community. Everyone was warm and friendly. They would all convene afterward in a bar around the corner that boasted the BEST jukebox in Edinburgh. They blasted GREAT artists like The Doors, The End, Bob Marley & Oasis. LOUDLY all night while drinking and shooting the shit with others.

That year, Sam also took on some work as part of the stage crew at the Royal Lyceum Theatre Edinburgh, and at another theatre along the way. Sam is not too proud to say that he was terrible in the role. Sam tried his best for various tasks; but his efforts were lacking. He was just more comfortable on stage than behind it, and that was where Sam felt he could shine. In his bid to become a better actor, Sam's love for theatre deepened. He had his favorites that he idolized like Tom McGovern. Watching them, Sam was determined to bring his passion into a career. While being tall and broad-built had felt like a challenge growing up - it had taken Sam awhile to feel comfortable with the fact that he couldn't hide in a crowd - becoming a virtue as an actor. On a couple of occasions, simply on account of his stature, Sam found himself promoted from the youth theatre and put into main productions; albeit in minor roles. It was like being an extra in a film with no lines. But, the experience was incredible. It was also an opportunity to possibly be backstage with those that Sam idolized and considered his heroes.

In the world of acting, head shots open doors. If Sam wanted to attract studio
heads, he had to have one. It had to be something that made his look professional, and not just a young hopeful. Sam found a local photographer to take some pictures and hoped money wouldn't be wasted. Sam had been cast in a TV docudrama as Lord Darnley in Mary, Queen Of  Scots. Sam had no dialogue with the actress playing the title. The only drawback to this role Sam discovered, which would follow him in his career, was the uncomfortability of his uniform. It was huge and clanked every time Sam moved around. It was an unexpected challenge Sam had to conquer quickly and he soon found himself enjoying it. Sam found himself enjoying the learning process of the filming procession. As soon as the director yelled Cut! for the final time, Sam knew his heart would always reside with the theatre. That was where Sam was born as an actor. Even though the big and small screen provided many opportunities, Sam always seen the stage as HOME!

By the end of the year following Sam's failed drama school audition, he had emmersed himself into the world of theatre. Sam had already been involved in a string of productions with Lyceum Youth Theatre when he realized he wasn't much of a stagehand, and appeared in a few low-budget TV programs. More significantly, Sam had come in contrast with several professional actors. They all knew of Sam's plans for drama school. As time approached him to audition again, they helped Sam on his quest. Some even helped him to rehearse until he felt completely comfortable with the characters of Sam's choosing. It helped Sam to build his confidence, which is something Sam lacked in his first attempt.

Sam returned to Glasgow's Royal Scottish Academy Of Music & Drama with high hopes as well as mixed feelings. Sam was determined to get to drama school, but by year out, he heard of studying at the English capital. Drama Center London caught his imagination. The idea terrified & excited him. Sam's idol/muse Carolyn Devlin had attended the school and encouraged him to apply as soon as Sam stepped back into the Royal Scottish Academy, it felt like THE PLACE for him. Sam felt AT HOME! He waited to TAKE IN what the place had to offer. He felt he made the RIGHT choice. This time, Sam auditioned with a year's practice under his belt. Everything he had learned in the past 12 months led to this moment. Sam felt both thrilled and complete. It was time for Sam to leave his mom/home and spread his wings.  As he prepared to start his first term, word had gotten out that there would be a change in the teaching staff. Still, Sam felt very fortunate for his position. And had no plans of wasting the opportunity he was given. To this day, Sam had NO REGRETS!

Moving from Edinburgh to Glasgow was a very happy time for Sam. He made such good friends at the Royal Scottish Academy; and felt like he was being treated seriously as a young actor while living independently. Sam moved in with 2 girls from his course, and another actor they never really saw. Like any first year student, they rioted. They got high and wandered the streets looking for the best Sunday roast(s) to curb their munchies. They went out and danced at The Arches; the infamous nightclub venue, or hung out at Trader Joe's during karaoke night. They didn't sleep and their weekends were a complete blur. By then, almost 2 years had passed since Sam left school. He was a little older than his cohorts at drama school, and maybe even wiser about the Scottish theatre scene from having met as many of the players whilst working at Edinburgh. Sam also got a glimpse of the professional world he'd be attending. Sam likes to have a genuinely good time; but he knows when to cut the shit and get shit done. So, every lunch break, without fail, after throwing nutrients down his throat, Sam would find one of the numerous empty rehearsal rooms and work for 30 minutes on improving his voice.

Sam felt driven. His voice work paid off. He entered and won the Elaine Gullen poetry speaking competition. Sam's favorite piece was from Edwin Morgan's Phaedra in full Scots. It was a play Sam had watched whilst working as an usher at Lycom. Sam would stand in the wings; ready to guide the audience to the audience to their seats, but also to allow access for the actors to pass through. It was a play that Sam watched repeatedly and he would love to be in a revived version. Sam was passionate and ambitious; and among people who shared his interests and values. Sam KNEW he had alot to learn, and knuckled down  to make every moment count. Sam KNEW EXACTLY when he learned to act. That moment occurred in Sam's sophomore year at the Royal Scottish Academy during a production of Romeo & Juliet. Acting is being in the moment. Sam's tutor deliberately tore him down in order to build him back up. Even though Sam was no doubtly being challenged, this view came as a blow. Sam had to PROVE it. Not just to his tutor, but also to himself.

Sam had to let go of the outside mentality. Sam knew he had in mind an idea of what it meant to understand the lessons, he had to interpret them his way. Existing in the moment as he played a character, and liberating himself from any sense that he was acting. Allow the text to come ALIVE! from you. It felt like magic to Sam. If the actor's body is open, a vessel, then the character is literally in the words and the play comes to life. Sam is DETERMINED to show he had what it took. All Sam had to do was let himself go. He knew what the teacher was getting at. But, at the same time, Sam thought of all that could go wrong. Sam had that example happen when he was invited back to his old theatre to take part in a version of A Midsummer's Night's Dream. Sam was playing Theseus/Oberion; a really big commanding character. It was near the end when Sam was due to make a GRAND speech; but midway through. . . .Sam registered the audience and everything went to hell.

When the audience went silent, Sam's brain WOKE UP! to what he was supposed to focus on. He broke from being frozen. After the applause, Sam KNEW he could NEVER let this happen again. Sam had to stop being so self-conscious. Sam had to think at that time alot; not just because it was an epiphany for him. He was learning to feel at home on stage; but Sam still had ALOT to learn. He often thinks back to those early days, because it's one thing to be in the moment on stage. Over time, Sam had learned to disappear into a character with 1/2 of his brain, while the other remains conscious of the rest he needs to remember.  As a student actor, learning to lose himself in a role proved to be a turning point. It became a SAFE place. Hiding behind a character blocks Sam from having to FACE himself.    

During the production of Romeo/Juliet, Sam was approached to audition for the lead role in a play called Outlying Islands. Even though Sam was only a student, the director was impressed by the performance after he auditioned that he offered Sam a part straight away. As the play was due to be staged at the prestigious Edinburgh Festival. Sam couldn't turn it down. First, Sam needed to get permission from the Royal Academy to have his studies on hold for this part. Fortunately for him, they recognized that a professional production for this caliber could be an invaluable schooling lesson. They gave Sam a chance to spread his wings & fly. It was like the first tour of a just signed band. The play had done well, and they were transferred to the Royal Court Theatre. It was an incredible opportunity for Sam. Even taking this show to Toronto in the winter.

It was an honor to perform the play so widely; especially at prestigious theatres, and yet the smallest venues were the most rewarding. It was such a privilege, like being part of a shared experience. It reminded Sam of his childhood in New Galloway. In bringing the play to the stage across pockets of Scotland that Sam never visited before, he hoped youngsters in the audience would've been inspired just as Sam had. By the time the run ended, Sam had just a few months left of drama school. He had returned to the Scottish Academy for the end of his 3RD and final year and they allowed Sam to graduate. It was highly unusual; but Sam was so grateful for the understanding/support from his teachers. It was unconventional schooling and in some ways a fast track to becoming a professional. Sam was able to repay EVERYONE and pay it forward to those who've helped him. Sam also created a play-writing competition that enriches kids' lives. Sam just learned so much on the job; he wanted to give some back. As much as Sam loved the character on stage, he was to be on the sidelines of life. Looking in . . .no matter the situation or location.

Fresh from the Royal Scottish Academy Of Music/Drama, Sam set out to build his experience. This meant auditioning and proving his resilience. . .something Sam wasn't very good at. Sam didn't know how to prepare, and he would often find himself not being able to deliver what he felt the casting director was looking for. Before the audition, Sam would spend ages researching his character. He would fill journals with cut-outs, timelines, history notes and study the costumes and the director's past productions. Sam would look into the era in which the character lived, or their motivations in the story, and forget the key point to auditioning: learning the lines. Sam would be all prepped as he could be; only to disengage as he muddled through. Sam knew why he wasn't getting the part he wanted, and quickly changed how he prepared for auditions. Sam was also keenly aware that it was a cutthroat business. As much as he hungered for a role, Sam was in competition with actors who knew how to deliver exactly what was required. If anything, it encouraged Sam to focus on - surprise! - learning his lines and conquering his nerves by losing himself in a character.

In the early years, as an eager actor, Sam discovered that auditioning was a craft in its own right. The more Sam attended, the better he got at them, and slowly the rejections turned into recalls. While Sam sat in a pool of sweat, nerves. . .older more successful & experienced actors would be given priority, and as they left, they'd embrace the casting director. Sam would sit green with envy and a curt NEXT! as he walked through the audition room door as if facing the gallows. Sam didn't despair, however. He just had to build his relationships all around.

Sam's very first taste of success came in the form of a television miniseries; Island At War. Sam played a British spy. It was an exciting time, a chance to work with high-profile actors, but Sam didn't quite know how to act for the cameras. All of his experience came from reading books. Sam devoured Michael Caine, Laurence Olivier and a host of other acting biographies/manuals. Sam was hoping for insight; but nothing beats learning on the job. Sam allowed the character/actions to take over. Sam didn't need to over-the-top elaborate or signify intensity with his eyes on the scene. He just needed to be truthful.

Knives In Hens was one of the first significant theatrical parts that Sam landed after graduating. A play that one only dreams of. One that you don't truly appreciate and fully understand until later. It challenges the audience and digs into the human psyche, exposing the dark places. They opened at The Tron Theatre in Glasgow, only for the production to snowball into something far bigger than Sam could have ever anticipated. After the initial run, they took the show on the road for what would be an unforgettable experience for several reasons. Acting gives the opportunity to explore dark places. Knives In Hens provided Sam with one of those roles. In losing himself in his character, Sam saw a chance to release the power and rage of him. Sam was only in his early 20s, and although tall & broad, he had found a place on the sidelines, playing nice guys or decent guys. Sam was given an opportunity to open up in an imposing way.   

Sam knew he had learned to convey a sense of power & darkness. Using that to bring the character to life for the audience. Everything began to go well, and word was beginning to spread that this was a play worth watching. Going for a long run before any work helps Sam FOCUS and clear his mind to relax him. There have been times when Sam has overdone the workouts, only with very little prep time to get into costume and be ready. Sam has needed longer than an allotted time-frame. On the opening night, however, the mix of adrenaline, sweat, loss & fatigue meant that Sam's body was cramping, and he couldn't make the pain. The more he couldn't mask it; the less Sam could concentrate. He wanted to disappear. When the curtain came down, Sam swore he was done and he'd never act again. Sam was ashamed of himself and of his body. Feeling he'd let the cast & crew down for a moment they'd all worked HARD for.

Overnight, having dwelled on what happened, Sam resolved that he won't be defeated. Allowing the character he was playing led the way. The next night, Sam's character returned with a vengeance onstage. He was steadfast and the show brought the audience to their feet. Sam swore he would never let his personal life dictate his professional life again. If Sam exercised prior to showtime, it allowed him time to recover and be PRESENT. Midway through the run at The Macrobert Arts Cenre in Stirling. Sam was enjoying the process immensely. Things were going great for him. He was earning enough to get by - or at least pay the rent - but it wasn't about that. He simply loved being onstage with the character. Then, midway through that run, Sam received a message completely out of nowhere. It was from the father whom abandoned Sam years before.

Sam's father wasn't just in the country. He was staying close by. So about an hour prior to going onstage, Sam met the man who had walked/left his son's life before Sam had any REAL memory of him. Sam had no idea in his mind about what his father might've looked like. What's more, any feelings Sam might've had about this man's reappearance just didn't have time to solidify in his mind. So when this man appeared, Sam felt he was meeting an old acquaintance from a time so long ago that Sam lost all emotional connection. With time before showtime, Sam suggested they go for a walk. As they walked the university campus, they made small talk with Sam being guarded, as if he just met a stranger. Sam's brain was half of the experience, soaking up the thoughts/emotions and half of him was mentally checked out. As he was halfway throughout the walk, Sam was taken aback and stopped in his tracks.

They had exactly the same gait. From their easy stride to their pace, they walked in an identical manner. They moved their way in the world the exact same way with energy and direction. It was uncanny and it didn't make Sam feel entirely at ease. Anyone could tell they were father/son, but Sam felt no connection to him whatsoever. Sam's performance proved to be challenging. Sam KNEW his dad was in the audience, and he couldn't disconnect from it. His dad also invited him to dinner after at a local Indian restaurant. Sam truly did not want to go - he was feeling very overwhelmed & confused - but Sam agreed out of politeness. Due to the past with his dad, Sam didn't know how to react.  

Sam wondered if he should be forcing a relationship that wasn't there. The only way Sam could process the situation was to step back and consider his dad to be like a character he was to play with in the future. It was hard to find a way to relate to him otherwise. It was hard to form an intimate feeling for someone that required all the time his father was absent. Sam tried like hell to open up, but just couldn't all the time. Sam doesn't let people into his life with ease. Trust is hard for him to establish. Sam just learned to enjoy his own company. He craves it. He is somewhat guarded for it, and that is perhaps why Sam is drawn to acting. Onstage, Sam needs to be the opposite of something that has become second nature to him. Acting allows Sam to drop layers and let go. That is when Sam comes ALIVE! Much to his surprise & delight, Sam finds that being in the wilderness allows him to do the same thing.

At the time, moving to London seemed like the right thing to do. It was a right of passage that so many young British actors felt they had to go through in order to be at the center of things. Go where you could be seen. For all of its excitement of living in London, unless Sam could land a role, he had no money. Sam was living with a bunch of struggling young actors in the north of the capital. They survived on bagels and cheap beer. Like the others, Sam needed to find a way to support himself financially by taking casual, and then full time work. Sam knew he had to be available for auditions, and immerse himself in London's culture.

  

Within a short period of time, Sam found himself holding down multiple jobs. He worked behind the bar multiple times, delivered sandwiches via bicycle (in the dead ass height of winter). Sam found himself in charge of the entire NHS doctors' rotation in South London, and even found himself selling perfume, and then Vivienne Westwood clothing at Harrod's. In some ways, Sam was playing roles; only to closer in perpetuity to becoming an actor. Most of his free time was spent looking for acting opportunities. That meant travelling around town to auditions by a multitude of transportation that proved to be least expensive, so his bicycle was put to good use. In London, Sam joined the young legion of young hopefuls who dreamed of a big break while working to pay the rent.

Sam's ambition becomes a valuable asset, because as time wore on, it stopped Sam from giving up in despair. By now, in his mid-20s, Sam had friends who held down jobs, with a proper sense of securities . . .and yet, Sam was counting pennies to get through the day. Sam would get work and be financially compensated for it. . . just enough to stay afloat; and that became a way of life. Sam lived in hope, daydreaming as he peddled through the streets or was rocked to sleep by the city train. It was mundane at times, and stressful at times, when it came to cash. For jobs to pay the rent, Sam landed a job in a soap opera back in London that was deemed to be more rewarding than what Sam was doing before. Sometimes, Sam thinks of himself as a loner by design. In some ways, we yearn to be with others. . .other times we EARNED the right to fly solo in life.

Robert The Bruce

As a boy, Sam was obsessed with Robert The Bruce; known as King Of The Scots. He was a Hero in Sam's eyes. Imitating his hero as a boy. Sam truly loves how Scottish legends have become entwined with Arthurian myth. Those stories entranced him as a boy. During the formative years when his mother took to the Lycum; Merlin became Sam's favorite production. As a young actor in the early 90s, Sam was particularly fired up on being asked to audition for Camelot. After auditioning several times, Sam was given a callback for the final round; only to lose out to someone else. It was/is Sam's dream to play Arthur,King Of The Brits.

Holding down cash-in-hand jobs in London, while hoping a casting director might throw a favorable bone at home; Sam slipped into dire straits. He was in no way in discouragement of becoming an actor. Sam found himself dependent on other people, as well as an element of luck, to make himself a success. It meant when an offer came Sam's way, no matter the position, Sam took it without question. He needed the money; as well as the experience. Sam was in no position to nitpick. Sam didn't have that kind of luck. So, in 2005, when Sam landed a role in a Scottish soap opera called River City; he saw a chance for a regular income doing something he loved. Sam would miss his life; but he had to jump. It was something he had to do. It meant moving back to Glasgow and an itinerant living out of a suitcase.

In River City, Sam played a football golden boy named Andrew Murray. Sam saw it as a challenge due to his complete inadequecy with any kind of ball. He was lastly picked in school for any sports team. A challenge Sam was willing to embrace; a first in many to truly be who he was to become as an actor. Filming on the set of a soap opera is very difficult from the stage. Sam felt NEW to television. Without an audience, Sam had ALOT to learn. With soap opera work, its considered grut work training wheels for a future in a business to success. Sam's brain that didn't want to comprehend his work had to overtime. It was tough & demanding, and a steep learning curve. Sam enjoyed the ride. It wasn't a world of riches, but it paid the bills and fed him. It was priceless. After a year on River City, despite the regular income. . . Sam decided to get back to his roots; seek inspiration elsewhere and play new exciting roles/characters.

Sam found himself following the work, and landed the role of Dickie Greenleaf in a daring production of The Talented Mr. Ripley. Sam loved the creativity & physicality of the play, which they performed in Northampton. Sam also took on small roles in TV shows, before gravitating slowly back to London. Sam also learned to live outside of a suitcase, staying in hotels for a few days or weeks, or crashing with very generous friends before moving once again. Even if Sam wanted to place roots somewhere, it would've been impossible due to being on the move for the job. Thanks to Sam's time on soap operas, having previously struggled to get credit due to his own debts; Sam finally qualified for a credit card with a 100,000 credit limit. Sam was over the moon. It wasn't about the finances, but the fact that he was making progress as an actor. So, rather than building a home; Sam found himself for the next big deal. Over the next couple of years, it became a way of life. ALWAYS on the move. Sam learned to love it.

Every time Sam arrived in a new city, Sam felt like an explorer. He wasn't alone in this. He made great friends with those around him and continued to keep his eyes on the horizon. In 2009, Sam traveled to Birmingham to work on a daytime TV drama called Doctor's where Sam played Scott Nielson; a love interest for one of the nurses. When his character died of a heroin overdose, Sam left the show hoping he would be recognized as an actor who was comfortable portraying dark, conflicted characters.   

In any profession that relies on opportunity, it's easy to let self-doubt creep in. Several years have passed since Sam left drama school, and though her acting CV was growing, Sam sometimes felt like his BIG BREAK had eluded him. Sam is GRATEFUL for the parts he's played, and had learned so much for the experience. As time passed, and Sam continued living hand-to-mouth in London, juggling casual work with audition calls, Sam began to wonder if he was letting himself down in some ways. Part-time work was fun at times, but unrewarding. While some of his peers were falling to the side, Sam stayed resilient. Or perhaps stubborn. For every audition Sam attended, he was increasingly aware that his looks may be an influencial factor. He was 20-something with a physical presence. As a result, Sam aimed to make sure that he hit the right marks in terms of expectation. Sam even worked as a lifeguard, though he was completely unqualified. He was essentially required to fold towels and check the PH levels of the jacuzzi, but he still felt nervous each day and quickly handed in his notice, despite the free access to the gym that came with the job.

Sam was careful with his diet, but now began to understand the necessity to eat more to allow his body time to thrive. He paid attention to calorie intake, and considered every meal in terms of what it might mean for his chances of getting work. In hindsight, when Sam considers that time in his life, he recognized that he was living for a while with a low-level eating disorder. The requirement for an actor drove him too far sometimes. Sam loves training, but in his early years, it had led to an unhealthy relationship with food. He rationed what he ate, often consuming salads knowing they were low in calories. We often talk about the pressure on women to conform. Sam certa made inly felt the same expectation upon him, which is why Sam responded by maintaining a disciplined eating and exercise regime. It was a form of control in a world that Sam wasn't in. He just felt like he had to do something to make himself selectable for a role. The right clothes, the right hair; etc. There were things Sam tried to change & adapt as the audition required. It wasn't healthy, nor was he happily fulfilled. One more sacrifice he had to make became more muscular that he began to think of food in terms of nutrition. It FORCED him to start researching health/fitness, and that's when Sam recognized that the body needs a healthy, balanced diet to survive & grow. It was a vital lesson, and even now he sometimes had to remind himself that there can be NO compromise.

Sam still runs today; mostly to clear his head. His work allows him to TRAVEL THE WORLD. When Sam's running,he becomes invisible. It's his time & place. Each run is a journey. Young Alexander The Great was one of the first movies Sam had made. It was a bit of a car-crash production in the making. Sam is FOREVER GRATEFUL it NEVER made the big screen. Or any screen for that matter. Despite the challenges - and there were many - too many to calculate. They had a terrific time on-set and made firm friends with the cast/crew. It was just one of those films with big ambitions and great intentions, a shoestring budget and compromises that were hard to cover-up. It was an incredible experience, with hundreds of extras in key scenes. It hadn't banked on the fact that in playing a young Alexander, Sam would be expected to ride any horse but a giant stallion. There was no way Sam could admit he wasn't able to take on the task. He just took the reins - literally - and hoped for the best. It looked great for the camera. Sam had no idea how to make the damn thing stop once he had ridden it out of shot. Literally. The director yelled Cut! But, it made no difference. The horse was on a mission, and when it finally showed and turned around, Sam had to pretend he didn't hear the director's call. He felt like a complete & total dumbass. Even if he had been able to ride convincingly, all of his acting muster could not distract from the fact that Sam was strapped.

Regardless of this finished movie, Sam's memories of that production never fail to make him smile. He looks back and recognizes that every milestone is important to life. The rewards might be unexpected, while the experience can only make you wiser and better prepared. On his return flight from Egypt, Sam vowed that the time hadn't come for him to learn to ride a horse properly. His big break hadn't materialized as Sam had hoped, but if he was ever asked to climb into the saddle for the camera again, he'd be prepared. 

Following the release of Young Alexander in 2010, Sam began auditioning for roles in bigger television/film productions. Things seemed promising on paper, and yet the years that followed were fulfilled with rejections. To make things harder to handle, sometimes Sam would find himself recalled. Sam would not try to excite himself for a 2ND interview, but it would be hard for a project that would be career-making. As well as chasing around casting calls in London, Sam began flying out to L.A., or to his great excitement - they flew him out to him. Sam's first visit in L.A. was to test for a big-budget television show in the making. Naturally, Sam was excited. It felt significant, as if perhaps he might be going places at last. His last visit to the U.S. had been travelling prior to the drama school. Before this, Sam traveled the country penny-pinching. Now, the costs were covered by the production company.

If Sam was honest with himself, this was hardly the definition of success. He was still working dead-end jobs due to yet getting the work he really wanted to pursue. Sam had enjoyed the journey so far, but time was ticking. Sam was in his early 30s and bartending. So, having arrived in L.A., Sam was determined to make the most of his short story.  

With a few hours prior to the audition, Sam decided to tour Los Angeles up to Hollywood, voting all of the cinematic history that Sam always wanted to visit. As the tour continued, Sam's Nokia phone went off. He was 20 minutes late to his bartending shift. He lost complete track of the time in lieu of tourism. He forgot to call the time of work. After finding out his location from work, the phone went silent. From there, Sam continued to enjoy the tour. 

With a big-time audition that had taken Sam out of his bedside and across the Atlantic, it was impossible not to get his hopes up. Even though Sam knew the competition to play Aquaman would be intense, Sam was disappointed to head home having missed out on the role. The audition had been very strange. They took turns to throw down push-ups, then one-by-one they were paraded in front of suits. It felt like everyone from the network was there. While push-ups were intended to leave you feeling bulked-up, they leave you more sweaty. Heat & Sam just don't get along. That is why Sam settles for black for most situations: Black hides a multitude of sins. Sam began to pick up further calls that sent him back to L.A. as time passed. While Sam learned to be realistic about his chances of success among other actors in his situation, he never gave up on his dream.

As Sam came to realize he had to play the game according to L.A.'s rules, Sam relied on the tireless work of his agent. Once he figured the lay of the rules, Sam found himself being advised on what was on the UP & UP! Driven in the right & proper direction, it was completely new to him. It felt weird, but Sam thought it was part of the process. Having come this far, with little to lose, Sam could afford to expand how he wanted to present himself. It soon looked like Sam was going places, but Sam took public transport. With what little money he had from bartending gigs in London, any travel throughout L.A. was due to the bus or Metro. It was ALL he could afford, but something he kept hidden. One cannot buy into indulgences; but Sam does love the airy environment. Paramount Studios are Sam's favorite place to visit due to it being a great place to change in with the lavatories. Sam learned a fashionable mistake by sweating through white. The receptionist was caught off guard that Sam took the bus. More like taken aback.

At a time when Sam was shuffling between couch surfing and short term rentals, he had received an invitation for the film; Tron:Legacy, with a blockbuster budget. The initial audition was surprisingly well. As a result, the studio wanted to fly Sam out. They flew him out on first-class and stayed in a luxurious hotel that Sam could NEVER have afforded out of his own pocket, up until Universal Studios. It was exciting; but up until Sam came down with the flu preceding the week of the trip. Sam didn't quite feel like himself as he packed. He felt like complete shit. Sam was living in a rough portion of North London. Sam was next door to dangerous drug dealers who piqued interest in Sam's vehicle from the situation. All he could do was jump in and hope a restorative sleep on the plane would help Sam to live up to expectations. It didn't.

Anyone in the tail end of a flu looks absolutely terrible. Whomever Sam caught a glimpse of himself in the darkened windows of the car that transported him, Sam seen someone he didn't even recognize. It didn't help that he was stressing out about the fact that he might have to tip the driver. Sam had only a few dollars in his pocket, and that was it. The driver could tell of Sam's financial status because he accepted his pitiful offering with good graces, and wished Sam luck. After a change of clothes that looked incredible with a leather jacket & a tight shirt from the wardrobe. Sam was practically glowing with good health. It was all a front, but for a brief moment, Sam felt like he belonged. It meant he could be proud of himself. Ahead of the first scene, with a full crew, Sam felt confused. He was used  to multiple cameras from his soap opera days. Going with your instincts. The space & freedom to what he wanted them momentarily, and Sam forgot his lines. Then, to regain his memory, Sam did some push-ups, breathed & relaxed. It was fun, to be lax and let himself be Sam. 

On his return flight, Sam heard from his agent that ultimately casting for the film had gone in a different direction. Sam wasn't surprised. He hadn't established himself yet, though he did have a Garrett Hedlund look to him. Sam told himself it was only a matter of time. Even if so much of it comes to luck, Sam was doing the right thing by following his path in life. He had to push himself forward without turning back. Every time, Sam would save up so that he could spend time in L.A. for pilot season. On the morning before his first audition, Sam stopped off for breakfast at a diner. In true California style, Sam had eggs & avocado toast with hot sauce (and ketchup). The food was delicious, and a coffee to top it. It costs him $20 before the tip. As he stepped outside, Sam seen the immenties he couldn't afford. He would have to pick up his food from supermarkets to eat in his room, and rely on his manager for the rest. . .which he was good for.

Sam was always desperate to keep his clothes as fresh as possible, as Sam had a limited wardrobe. Under the West Coast sun, it proved all but impossible to stay cool. He had to MAKE IT WORK! Sam's manager's house was a great reprieve from the heat. Sam's manager then treated Sam to a bar from The Four Seasons. Sam was then told by some executives, he was destined to make movies. As the days & weeks passed, Sam found himself changing in subtle, unexpected ways. Sam was used to living out of a suitcase with no form of roots with family or routine to keep him grounded. He had traveled all over the U.K. for work, and had grown comfortable with clinging to hope, seeing it slip away and then grasping for the next opportunity, Sam had plenty of friends, some of whom were in the same situation, but in Los Angeles. Sam couldn't relax. Either way, he felt like an alien in the city, or the population was foreign to him. Even though Sam had no idea that he could call home, apart from a run-down, miserable London bedsit, Sam felt a long way from something. On a subconscious level, Sam just wanted to fit in. If he could feel like be belonged out there then perhaps the breaks in his career would open up to him. Slowly but surely, Sam's newfound accent is bedded in. On occasion, if someone picked up on it and asked where Sam was from, he gave some vague answers about living in the U.K. for a while. It was an understatement, but he hoped it carried the faintest suggestion that he had started out on a side of the Atlantic. 

As Sam's account enriched (at times pretending to be Canadian, with no recourse of the actual dialect) what money Sam possessed began to run out. Sam couldn't help but feel like he was letting down those whom helped him. At the same time, Sam's need to feel accepted by L.A. had taken a desperate turn. Having arrived looking like a low-budget Londoner, Sam had taken to wearing cowboy hats & jeans, a vest and open shirt. . . and a Stetson. It wasn't big or clever. Sam thought if he made a big impression with a big personality that earned him attention in America, if he could create that impression through his appearance, perhaps he could be a contender. In real reality, Sam tried to be someone else and lost himself for all the wrong reasons.

When the money - and with it his stay - Sam's came to an end. He left his manager's house for the final time. Sam just walked. He had no desire to go back to his hotel just then. Despondently, Sam crossed Hollywood on foot. As a pedestrian, with his dreams all but gone, the streets revealed themselves as dusty and dirty. Sam drifted alongside the Walk Of Fame and Sunset Blvd. and various ICONIC Hollywood locations. Traveling through the city, Sam felt the city was laughing at him. At this point, Sam was hurting in all areas. He was counting the coins in his pocket, hoping he'd have enough for a Metro ticket back to his hotel, when his phone went off. He was alerted that his bank account was on the RED. Sam had zero money and NO WAY home. He was lost in L.A. He emotionally broke down. He felt like a failure whom was thrown away.

At this point, Sam was well-fuelled from the outside. He had the hotel waiter to thank for that. The waiter's accent reminded him of a time when Sam filmed a movie on-location in the actor's homeland. In A Princess For Christmas, Sir Roger Moore played Sam's aristocratic, castle-dwelling father. Towards the end of the film, both Sam & Roger could tell that their co-star Katie McGrath was feeling the pressure. Sam's been in her shoes/situation, where you muddle through a moment in a scene and just know you've done better. Sam had to face himself not to smile. Sir Roger had sabotaged a shoot that Katie had to re-do. Sam loved Sir Roger as much as he loves ANY Christmas movie. Bad Santa is one of Sam's ULTIMATE holiday films. In Scotland, irritation runs amuck when the world runs Halloween right into prior to Christmas. What's the rush?

Shuffling between London & L.A. funded by what money Sam earned, he tried out for any role anywhere. Yet, anxiety crept around the corners. Sometimes, Sam could overcome it, but there would always be occasions where Sam would let himself down. His agent assured him that nerves were natural. To make things tougher, in America, if Sam made it through the first audition and into recalls efficiently, it would lead to contract negotiations. Even though Sam hadn't secured the part, his agent would be expected to strike a deal with the studio that could be signed if it all worked out. The system is designed to promote confidence and efficiency for the production. In reality, for a broke actor like Sam, it meant that he KNEW the value of a role - and it had the potential to be life-changing. Sam would calculate what debt he could pay off, get his priorities in order and begin to dream BIG! Doing very little for Sam's nerves. Whenever Sam found himself in this position, he wondered if the tables were turned, if everything turned out okay. Sam never seen it as a chance to make money; it was more about possibilities open to him.

There were moments in Sam's career when he was up in the running for a project, he would be gutted when the project fell through. Sam was also in the running for a Superman reboot, having been taken under the guise of the film's producer. Like a dumbass, Sam placed his hopes in landing the role. Back in L.A., Sam was lent a house to stay in, along with a personal trainer to help fill out the costume. He was prepared for the part. To do anything for the part, and that included adding meat to his diet to help build muscle. Sam was living a quaint life as a vegetarian. Then his trainer suggested that protein from sources kike chicken/steak was effective in building muscle, and that was something Sam couldn't ignore. While the Superman project went on without him, Sam sought comfort in the fact that working on his physical presence could help him stand out for future roles. Sam always seen himself as a vegetarian inhabiting the body of a carnivore.

Getting close to landing roles but never lighting that cigar, it was technology in the form of home video auditions that was Sam's saving grace. In the world of casting auditions, it sparked a revolution. Recording audition tapes in private and with no pressure did wonders for Sam's confidence. Over in Los Angeles, Sam quickly found it opened doors. Sam was invited across for more auditions or called in to talk about roles in detail, which made Sam feel like he was itching closer to the role of a lifetime. By accident rather than design, Sam's newfound passion for self-taping into a sideline business. Sam was still striving to earn a living for acting, but mostly making money from under-the-table jobs at catering jobs. Sam's shifts were in the evening, which gave him the daytime to work the audition circuit for a dream. Once Sam realized that recording his own auditions had potential, he spent what little cash he had on a half-decent video recorder and a couple of lamps. The pure & true example of working with what you've got to create his own D.I.Y. studio. Sam worked hard at creating the right environment that worked best for him. what made his eyes POP!

Sam left nothing to chance, and that was when his other actor friends began to pay attention. He began shooting tests for them, and they also got involved behind the camera. As well as filming auditions, they edited them on their computers to get them into the best possible shape for submission. It was a happy time; full of hope & promise, and then fed into Sam's outlook. Each audition had the potential to take Sam places. In turn, it helped him relax when required to perform in person, and ultimately led him into a role Sam simply could not refuse. Everyone knows of Batman. The idea that the concept might translate to a stage show was something Sam couldn't ignore. On that basis alone, Sam went to the audition simply to find out how on earth they were to pull it off. Batman Live! was a spectation on every level, and completely magical.

Sam can stand his ground as a fighter. On stage, at any rate. Not in any reflection of real life. Having learned judo as a boy, Sam had gone to pick up martial arts along the way. He also tried a little boxing and very little sword experience. Earning himself a fencing certificate during his time at drama school. It was a tool that would be handy in his acting repertoire. As Sam tried out for the Batman role, his efforts contributed to an outcome Sam had been chasing for years. To be precise, the role in this live extravaganza was shared between Sam and another actor. With a cast of 50 acrobats & actors, and a moving mechanized stage that took on a life of its own under the spotlight; it was truly a grandscale event. When the U.K. dates were successfully completely; Batman LIVE! hit stages globally! Other than a few "flatulent" bumps along the way; the show flew like wind with success!

Sam has always wanted to be known as an approachable and good person. It's not only human nature, and when it comes from the heart, we should feel like we're the best version of ourselves. As an actor, being nice isn't always a quality that opens doors. Even though Sam is able to play beyond his reach, people often fail to see beyond Sam's natural character. During his wilderness years before Batman Live!, when Sam was shuttling between fruitless auditions in L.A. & London, Sam was called in by the creators of Jame Bond to try for the lead. It blew Sam's mind to even be in the same class as those before him. Sam loved Timothy Dalton's take in The Living Daylights. So, Sam went along to the Bond HQ and tried out for the casting director.

They spoke a little about Scotland and about Bond, read the scene once and then Sam left. It was all just so quick, the swear beneath Sam's leather jacket just began to form. When Sam left, he wondered about the result from the interview. Sam knew there was stiff competition. When Sam learned the role had gone elsewhere, however, the feedback he received boiled down to the fact that Sam just wasn't edgy enough by nature. Sam was always keen on taking criticism so he could improve as an actor; he just seemed to lack the REALNESS of the character.

  

Even today, it can be frustrating to be assessed by who he was rather than what Sam can become in a role. Even though Sam plays Jamie Fraser and, yes, he does imbrue some of his own personality with some of Jamie's character. . .Sam is not actually that guy at heart. Ultimately, Sam doesn't believe he needs to be wild or unpredictable in the real world in order to bring qualities alive on stage or screen. Having faced years of rejection, which can be a bleak place, Sam has a wealth of emotion to draw from. That experience forced him to raise his game, and since then, Sam has always set high emotions for himself.  

Sam is prone to punish himself internally if he fails to achieve what he sets out to accomplish. He is very persistent. Perhaps that stubborness and determination is also part of the Taurean in him. Sam is also duly a people pleaser at heart. While it was a blast to play Batman, Sam wanted to move on to more complex characters who wore their pants on their inside. In truth, Sam still considered himself to be a theatre actor at heart. On stage, there's more freedom to move between very different roles, and yet Sam still hasn't arrived at a point in his career to cherry-pick.

Rather than wait for the right roles to come to him; which could have led to more waiting rooms, Sam built on his newfound confidence from 18-months in a large-scale production. Instead of heading home with his tail between his legs; Sam placed his chips on finding success on the other side of the Atlantic. With his earnings from the tour, Sam took a gamble and moved to America. Even though Sam had traveled to/from L.A. multiple times, this time, however, Sam brought a sense of resolve with him.. Having been conditioned to expect rejection, which helped Sam grow a thick skin, he believed he had a sense of something to offer. Sleeping on a mattress on the floor, north of North Hollywood, Sam drove the cheapest car he could find and keep his head down. He, along with his friend, Kirk, from his Batman days, would treat themselves to American BBQ and a few beers at an Irish bar in Hollywood Blvd all throughout the weekends. They felt like they were so far. . .yet so close. Conviction that it WILL HAPPEN!

With a temporary visa that allows Sam to work stateside, he found a place to live next door to a Denny's. Sam would wake up early at around 4-5A to watch U.K. sports. Sam also knew how to create the right impression in terms of what he wore and where he hung out.

Older and wiser that his last attempt to break in America, Sam felt he had something to offer. Lean & muscular with his hair now brunette, Sam definitely seen the parts becoming more interesting. Now, with new hair, Sam was being seen for more 'bad guy/badass' roles rather than the good-looking jocks. Batman Live! certainly brought Sam some attention in L.A. that he hadn't experienced before, and he didn't shy away from it. Sam filled his diary/agenda book with auditions and meetings, arriving at each one (despite L.A. traffic and a series of parking tickets) truly believing this would be his big break. When rejection came, Sam was so battle-hardened by disappointment that he brushed it off and moved on. When his money began to run out a second-time, Sam didn't desolate the Hollywood streets in loneliness. Instead he took the knowledge that he had put into his heart and soul into making his life shine! Sam also had a small group of friends going through the same as him supporting one another.

Sam had screen-tested for Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. He was given 3 scenes to learn on-the-spot. His potential love interest had the scenes pat. . .but it took Sam longer to grasp the material. Then despite being told to prepare in his own accent, the execs said to do the next sounding American. This might've thrown Sam in the past, but now, thanks to the experience, Sam felt confident, and he deftly switched to being an American. Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. didn't pan out for Sam, but he did feel he did a good test. It just wasn't what/who they were looking for. Sam could feel like his experience & growth custioning the blows; amour was now strong. Sam packed his bags with what money he had left and booked a flight to London. He had given L.A. a shot. . .his best shot; but now he had to face facts. Sam felt his luck was fading out. He didn't see for a reason to stay for a 3RD time for a charm that wasn't apparent. When rejection came, Sam was manning up.

It was good for Sam to see his London friends again. They welcomed him back with offers of a sofa bed while he found a room to rent. However, Sam's social circle changed upon his return home. Most of his friends were achieving the same dream as him. The second verse is the same as the first. But, this time, it seemed as though everyone else was trapped in their lives prior to Sam's departure. Sam couldn't blame them. They were living a life of RESPONSIBILITY with marriage, kids..etc. Only the other friend was moving to a more conventional way of living with a starting-up catering company serving up a high-end cocktails at social events. It was a means for finding an acting career. Shortly after his return with no immediate means of earning a living, Sam signed up for unemployment benefits. Only lasting a week. The whole process was miserable & depressing. Sam went through the process interview. The interviewer made Sam feel completely worthless. As a condition, Sam was expected to apply for cash. He is not workshy by any means. He couldn't recount his entire resume in the interview. Sam had had more embers of a dream smoldering inside of him. Sam had a fire inside of him. He had worked so hard as an actor. He had been patient in the eyes of rejection and seized an opportunity available to him. That ambition guided him through his 20s. Now that Sam was in his 30s, he had no job, no prospects and everyone in his ear trying to deter him.

it was the first time since he set out to become an actor that Sam questioned what he was doing. Sam knew looking back that he was confident over the years that he had made every effort/attempt to seize every opportunity to him. Rather than accept a state hand-out, for which Sam was utterly depressing, he found work behind a bar with his friend's company. Sam knew what he was doing. He felt comfortable with the role. A role that he thought his life was meant to be!  

Sam had readied a point where he was questioning what he was doing with his life. Despite a mental contemplation from flying home from L.A., Sam couldn't abandon his ambition. He had to have direction with a steady income that provided the necessities; food, shelter . . . etc. If he settled in London, Sam would keep himself in London's company and the social life south of the Thames. Working for a friends' catering company business, Sam found out that pretty much everyone in his friends' employment had some connection to acting. No matter their spectrum, it felt good for Sam to be in the accompaniment of those who shared that same passion and experience. They went to the theatre, discussed auditions and shared the bus home. 

One of the clientele that Sam unknowingly chatted up with was Richard Madden walking over for a Gin & Tonic on Sam's tray. They had met a few times, but Richard didn't recognize him. Once he left, Sam made a feeble excuse and made for the closest exit. He felt ashamed & embarrassed, but it also made him more resolved. Sam just couldn't settle into this hospitality as a way of life. It just wasn't where his heart belonged. As an actor, Sam wanted SUCCESS! At this point, Sam had become almost immune to rejection. He expected it. He would come close but to no score. Some 15 years after graduating from drama school, while bartending, Sam couldn't help but wonder if he had run out of road. He was struggling to find the money to cover his rent - but he also knew not to wallow. Instead of wishing he'd done things differently, Sam looked ahead and gave himself an ultimatum: If he hadn't made it by the time 

he was 40; Sam would pack in his dreams and go home.

By accident rather than design, throughout his years establishing his career as an actor, Sam had become a pretty good cocktail bartender. He knew how to mix drinks upon request. Sam truly took in the effect of having the showmanship of blending in a glass. In many ways, it was like being a chef. Sam wasn't ready to give up becoming a professional actor. He gave the journey to his next milestone birthday. If that failed to happen, Sam would be quaint behind the bar. He was okay with the idea of it. He liked working with good food/drinks. The sense of urgency fading, Sam could remain committed to auditioning for a few years, knowing everything would be okay. In some ways, it put Sam at an advantage.

An element of luck plays a hand in life. At the same time, persistence pays off. If you can keep going, Sam was still attending every audition arranged for him. If he heard anything at all, Sam expected the role he went out for had gone elsewhere. A few days earlier, Sam had auditioned for a role in a drama that was described to him as a time-travelling Scottish adventure. It was called Outlander; based on a series of historical fantasy novels by the American author, Diana Gabaldon. Sam hadn't read them, but when he mentioned them to a friend that he was trying out for the central character, Jamie Fraser; she was TRULY excited. According to his friend, if Sam got this role, all eyes would be on him. 

High hopes cause anxiety, that always got in the way of bringing a character to life! Ahead of the audition, Sam was given an except for the script. It was normal and it gave Sam a chance to prepare. The amount of what he was given was troublesome. Sam had 12 pages to learn HEAVY dialogue. Sam had a GREAT DEAL to learn, but he also found it revealed a lot to him about the character. Jame Fraser was fiercely loyal, intelligent & stubborn. He was also strong, grounded & stoic. Sam knew the interworking of who Jamie was. As he ran through the lines, Sam knew exactly Jamie was. A few days post-audition, when his agent called to confirm that Sam got a callback, his friends could barely contain their excitement. Despite this, Sam still refused to get his hopes up. 

It was only when Sam returned to the casting agent, it was only then that Sam sensed things would be different. Sam felt strong & in charge. Jamie Fraser felt like the culmination of those he's played before. All the skills Sam learned, and the failed auditions he'd attempted failed came into play with scenes. Sam COULD DO this. A few days later, while literally cart-pushing at his local supermarket; Sam's cellphone rang. After seeing it was those he auditioned for; Sam had gotten the part. Sam had abandoned a trolley he was due to fill. He headed straight for the pub next door to his friends. They partied hard that night. For the next few weeks, Sam was on Cloud 9. This was a culmination of years in the making. All Sam had to do was keep faith in himself to stay strong when fate seemed to keep twisting & turning against him. At last, Sam had big role in production of substance.   

Having been invited to join the Outlander production, things happened very quickly. Within days, Sam was back in Los Angeles to assist in the search for the right Sassenach. Suddenly, Sam was being driven through the Sony studios in a large SUV, free water & mints in the back. The studio gave Sam the Outlander background. Tough job; but someone had to do it. Sam had felt like he arrived in a different world. The previous time Sam had been in L.A., he was skint. Every door slammed on him; leaving him with a feeling with no option but to return to his life prior to auditioning. This time, Sam found himself being invited to production meetings and involved in conversations about the creative process. It was exciting; but reality hadn't set in. Sam still sees himself as the guy wishing behind the bar. At lunch with exec producers & drinks with casting producers, Sam's doubts disappeared. They were "normal" people having a seat at the table. Though Sam wasn't ready to let go of his former self in case he had to return to it.

Sam found himself sitting on the other side of an audition panel, and it struck him that he would be staying for a while Instead, Sam watched a long string of talented actresses inhabit the role o Claire. This also invokes stepping up as Jamie and acting a scene with them. Surrounding people were nervous, and Sam truly sympathized with them; having been in their shoes multiple times before. Sam was prepared to show what they could do with the proper time/space to relax and show what they could do with the role. One of the most memorable was Laura Donnelly. Laura had read for Claire; but was cast as Jamie's sister, Jenny. Another actor whom made it into the show was Graham McTavish; and Jamie's uncle and Sam's fun travel companion.   

When this dark-haired model with beautiful blue eyes introduced herself to the casting panel,Sam paid attention. In the first instance, this was down to the fact that the character of Claire spoke in the Queen's English; while Catronia Balfe has a soft-lovely British accent. Then proved to be no obstacle for her as Catriona tried for the part, and Sam wasn't alone when their chemistry meshed. It was after performing a specific scene with her, it left them both breathless. Catriona was wrapped in Sam's arms, and they both knew that Jamie & Claire had come into existence together. Sam felt bad for Catriona due to his profusive sweating under the L.A. sunshine.

Sam & Diana

Catriona was new to acting. It was a big leap for her, and Sam felt that he needed to be protective towards her; as supportive as Jamie is with Claire. What they developed off-screen shined with the cameras-on. Catriona was overwhelmed by work and the pressure of being thrust into the feature role of the show, but Cat tackled it head-on. Sam just wanted to make sure he had her back. Before filming commenced, and consumed their lives, they were invited to attend a 2-week Outlander boot camp in Scotland. With an assembled cast, they basically learned to become Highlanders. Sam had to set his own experience of riding the rooftop of an Egyptian taxi and riding a horse properly. They got to be comfortable with the grips with 18TH-century weapons, learning to speak Gaelic, and throw themselves into Diana Gabaldon's series of wonderful books so they could appreciate the world they were entering outside of the script. Sam also spoke to Diana at length, via e-mail and private messages. 

Sam has always loved the kilt, and now he's wearing one for work purposes. He took care of it. Jamie. . .being a fiery redhead, so Sam was required to dye his hair. They tried so many times to get it right. It was dyed & bleached 7x in the first 2 weeks and then had to be rested every 2-3 weeks. Eventually, Sam's hair rebelled during the beginning of Season 2 and couldn't take anymore. So, production had to have wigs made. As actors, they immersed themselves in an era  of Scots history that has fascinated Sam as a child. Boys with their toys, and they felt like children playing make-believe. Sam felt passionate about his role as Jamie Fraser. He could not wait for the first day of filming. Such immersive & intense preparation meant by the time they arrived on-set, it didn't seem like an acting job. They'd had a chance to develop their characters and their relationships with each other, so everything felt completely natural. When the cameras rolled, they felt like a family, and continued 8+ years later. 

After 2 months of filming, they had completed the first 4 episodes. In that time, the Outlander gang forged bonds and created firm friendships. It wasn't until they arrived in New York, that they realized what a BIG DEAL the show had/was becoming. Within the throws of pending success, pride in what they were doing, and the excitement from others with FANS, Sam just needed to get to grips with finding himself the FOCUS of so much ATTENTION!

Having gotten a taste of the wild reception that Outlander could expect as a relief to return to filming the rest of the series. The schedule was intense, often requiring 12-day blocks of shooting every night. It was hard work, but everyone shared the same commitment to adapting the novels to the screen in the most compelling way possible. As a result, Sam & Catriona didn't have much time to concern themselves with the rising tides of expectation that closed in all around them. As far as the internet fandom, Sam's popularity grew in social media overnight when he joined. He was no longer Sam from behind the bar; it seemed. He was an actor bringing Jamie Fraser to life. Sam enjoyed the interaction with fans and teased as much as he could about what they were shooting. In America, Sam & Catriona attended events, rubbed shoulders with successful actors, mingled at the Chateau Marmont; where Sam had his quiet breakdown a couple of years prior. The fans passion was heartfelt and Sam wasn't used to the intensity. He had become someone people believed they knew based on the character he was playing. Sam knew that was how it worked. He just needed to adjust. 

Out of the spotlight was where Sam is truly comfortable. On stage/screen, Sam was free to become the character. He loved both sides of his life. Sam needed to find a way to balance the attention without turning his back on it. It was a whole new world. Sam is often how much of him is in his character of Jamie Fraser. Honestly? A GREAT deal. Sam can save his emotions for Jamie and the cameras. When Sam thinks he KNOWS Jamie from the first pages of the script, Sam is surprised by Jamie's involvement. Sam needed to let Jamie take over and see where he ventured. At the end of the first season of the show, it had lead to a dark, bleak & challenging place.

Outlander has never turned away from sexual violence. It is a reflection of the era in the story. It comes with a sense of responsibility. Case in point: Jamie's brutal rape at the head of his nemesis, Jack Randall. The focus was on the consequences, but at the time, they felt like it was important to not shy away from the act itself. A clause in Sam's contract required him to film nude scenes. In the instance, Sam pushed back on the nudity within this scene to sexualize the horror of what Jamie undergoes. Eventually they agreed that Jamie should only be seen naked in the aftermath in a state of absolute defeat for evidentiary support. The closing scenes were incredibly challenging to film, even though, thankfully the nude shots ended on the cutting room floor. It was a harrowing experience. Sam spent hours in a state of undress, covered in fake blood; all for the scene in which Jack drives a nail through Jamie's hand to pin him to the table, and then Jamie's eventual rape. The cock shot did betray Sam's trust in the creative team due to the complete unnecessity of it all. As a result, Sam's always been keen to find ways in which they support & protect other actors required to place themselves in positions of great vulnerability. Good drama should never shy from any subject, but those portraying it should always feel protected. 

Shortly after wrapping the first season of Outlander, Sam landed another role. An independent film that took him inside the Arctic circle. Heart Of Lightness. The perpetual days transported the cast as much as their characters from their everyday lives. Sam couldn't have been more removed from both Outlander and the outside world. In some ways, it seemed like a sigh of relief for Sam. A chance to reset before Season 1 premiered in America. Sam knew life would be different. He just had no idea how transformative it would become. When the pilot premiered, it felt like a celebration. Everyone involved, Sam included, was proud of what they created. The critical & commercial success just meant a means to be built on Outlander quickly became Sam's central part of his life. Looking back, Sam can appreciate how it's shaped him both as an actor and as a person. In Jamie Fraser, Sam had found a role he could call his own. From where he starts to where his journey takes him, Sam just goes for it. By Season 3, Sam felt he was channeling Macbeth & Thesus rolled into one. To explore a role so deeply in a show with global appeal, it has been nothing but a privilege. Jamie has been the making of Sam as an actor. Away from the production, Sam is still the same person as he was before. Sam took that call in the supermarket and startled the shoppers with his euphoric cry. What changed? The way people relate to Sam off-screen. Unquestionably, it's a privilege to meet fans and feel like he was part of a story that has brought joy to their lives. It's only a shame that conventions are where Sam feels that love from the world-at-large. 

Without a doubt, Outlander proved to be a turning point in Sam's career. It's given him confidence, experience and most importantly - opportunity. Starring in a HUGE series like this can be all-consuming at times, but Sam has always strived to retain his sense of independence. As an actor, Sam had pursued other projects that provide him with fresh challenges. Sam is drawn to roles that take him far from what other people expect. Sam could've settled with being stereotyped into one role. . .but he wanted MORE! As the show found success, opportunities arose and Sam always has been committed to exploring new paths. In the breaks of filming for 6 seasons of Outlander with a 7TH to start later, Sam appeared in action comedies like The Spy Who Dumped Me with Kate McKinnon & Mila Kunis. It was FUN to make. It was a thrill to play the villain opposite to the hero in the film; Bloodshot with Sam thoroughly enjoying the action scenes. On stage on-screen, Sam just lives to explore what makes us human.

Sam doesn't believe in restricting himself to just being an actor. After many years in the wilderness, Sam found opportunities and success. It's been everything he's imagined. If he did nothing else with his life, Sam would still feel like something was missing. He is always looking for the next challenge on the horizon. Thus given rise to several projects far from film/television; including one dear to Sam's heart that allows him to give something back. MyPeak Challenge started out as a way for Sam to raise money for charity. In preparation to film Outlander, the producers paired Sam with a personal trainer and sent them to London to train for a few weeks. There, in breaks between punishing sessions, Sam began to assess his personal objectives & goals. If he's honest, Sam feels like his journey is nearing its end, and Sam wants to relish it for miles. What matters is that he could look back at each stage knowing they made the most of it. 

Sam and The Sassenach

Sam is DEAD SERIOUS about his Scottish whiskey. Sam can nerd out on tastings and talk about malts & distilleries with whomever will listen. Over time, Sam has acquired quite the collection. Scotch is the water of life. As Sam had a public profile by this time, they recognized that the easiest way would be to lend his name to a white-label brand. Sam could team with a drink company and mass market it. If they were going to launch a whisky business, it had to be on their own terms. The spirit would have to come from the heart. So, the next logical step in their quest was to take 2 weeks out of their work schedules and tour the finest distilleries Scotland had to offer. They sampled different blends throughout, and gradually began to refine the taste they had in mind. It was a fun & enriching experience. By the time they returned home, having met a master blender whom shared their vision, they found what they were seeking. A blend that reminded Sam of everything he loved about Scotland, with a unique sweet finish.  

Their whiskey had to be called the Sassenach. There could be no other name. In the summer of 2020, their whiskey launched in the U.S.A., following in the U.K. a year later. It has since picked up a slew of awards. When they found a distributor, Sam made it very clear that their drink isn't to be classified as a celebrity brand. Forging their own path along the way. Despite the time, energy & commitment; creating a tequila to stand alongside whiskey never felt like work. This was/is NO side hustle for Sam. It's about sharing your passion. 

Having set out on this journey alone, it feels right to complete it in company. Along the way, Sam has overcome obstacles in the landscape and demons of his own making. Sam has reflected on how he's arrived at this point in life and the friends he's made. Just before the first season of Outlander went into production. Sam learned his father was dying. The call came from a stranger. At least a stranger to Sam. She informed him his dad has been living in Canada for many years and was now facing the end battle of cancer. As time was running out, this woman wanted to know if Sam & Cirdan would like to fly out and visit him. It was ALOT for Sam to take in during that 1 phone call; and add insult to injury, this woman added that she was in-fact his ex-wife. Not only did his dad remarry; Sam's father started a new life across the Atlantic.

Given the time-strain running out for him, Sam didn't give much thought to reuniting. He had been absent from Sam's life for so long that Sam didn't even consider this man as someone missing from it. Cirdan agreed when answering this odd call was the right thing to do. And so at a time when Sam was preparing to play a character that would transform his career, Sam packed a bag for a part that was denied him since childhood. Sam & Cirdan lived their lives without a father. Thanks to the love, commitment & groundings from their mother, they grew into independent adults. So, in rushing to catch a fight to reunite with someone who should've meant more emotionally; Sam couldn't help but feel like he needed to find himself in the process.

Sam has always been content in his own company, and yet naturally he looks for love and companionship. He has invested in several meaningful relationships in his life. In the past; when Sam met someone worthy enough, he used to go in with 100% commitment. He didn't hold back. Sam adores the romance, and makes that particular person feel good. It's an amazing, heartfelt feeling when 2 people connect and create a genuine bond. Instead of being in the moment, wrapped up in happiness/bliss, Sam wonders if he could sustain it in time. Then, he factors in his work, which makes it hard for him to settle down, and question if it's right to lay a foundation of a relationship. Sam is more guarded & insecure. He hopes for simplicity once again. It doesn't take much for Sam to realize that perhaps he should apply the same approach to relationships. He is also mindful that he is the son of man who disappeared.

Having committed to setting down roots and starting a family, Sam's dad chose to leave the family, and the last thing Sam wanted to do was follow in his parental footsteps. Sam knows he is NOT his father's son. There is a genetic component, but his father played no part in shaping Sam's formative years. He had walked his own path in life, and intends for that to continue. Even though deep down, Sam fears he'll repeat the cycle. 

As a result, Sam finds himself bailing from relationships due to things becoming too good. A protective mechanism due to not wanting to harm anyone else or himself for that matter. By looking ahead and fearing the worst, Sam is well-aware that he could be undermining his chances of sharing his life with someone special. As an actor, Sam is trained to let go. Not to think about the next step or the next line in a script. He also knows from experience that you can't run a marathon by focusing on reaching the finish line from the moment you start the race. One step at a time with mindfulness on the move, letting the process dictate the outcome. Having adapted the same outlook on this walk of life, and learned to be himself, perhaps Sam can complete the picture by just being present in his personal life. If Sam can lose himself in the here/now; the future will take care of itself.  

Sam & Cirdan arrived in Calgary Airport feeling jet-lagged and apprehensive about what awaited them. Despite the fact that both of them felt uprooted from their lives to answer this call for compassion, it was for the Heughan brothers to travel together. On finding themselves thrown together this way, it felt like these brothers had each other. It was a cemented bonding experience despite the intense & strange circumstances. When their dad's ex-wife met them in Arrival's, she turned out to be lovely. With driving time ahead of them, they rented a car and took turns behind the wheel. Sam & Cirdan simply did their level best to deliver the group to their destination in one-piece. Their dad's ex-wife was confidant in her directions; but the conversation never shifted from polite, formal talk. After 12 hours on the road, they arrived at their dad's cabin; just outside the city. That first visit was brief; cut shirt as their dad wasn't well enough to see the boys, but proved momentous for Sam & Cirdan.

The moment they stepped inside to find that their dad had been keeping track of their lives, it brought their dad alive in some way. It gave them time to gather their thoughts, and get some much needed sleep. They had been invited to stay nearby with a friend of their dad's. Everyone was very pleasant & welcoming, but it was hard to relax. Sam & Cirdan were given a shared room. It had a set of brick beds, which made the Heughan boys feel like kids again. They enjoyed their time; but they never forgot they were on a mission to internally process the situation. A day after their first visit to the cabin, they finally had an audience with their dad. It felt like a lifetime had passed. On setting eyes on him in bed, he didn't seem so bad. They spoke for a while; but nothing was as impactful as their first moments at his cabin as Sam tried to assess who this man was in his environment. Everything had its place and told a story. In person, their dad was hard to read; his stare unsettled Sam and reduced him to feeling like a child once again.

Their stay lasted only a week. In that instance & intimate time, their dad, David, felt well enough to visit/sight-see with them. They sat under a tree together and he told his sons about himself. He was humorous, a talented gardener and a champion of bodynamic farming. In the view of this man from the fringes of society as much as their lives. In the moments spent with their dad, Sam forgave him for taking off, despite the pain he caused, but Sam still couldn't pin him down. From his time in Germany to his new life in British Columbia, it struck Sam that his dad was someone constantly drawn to see over the horizon. As his dad barely registered in his son's life and then chose to appear in it, Sam recorded everything he had to say on his phone. Sam felt a means of capturing something of him, and perhaps when he listened to it again, it would become even more meaningful to him. Sam's dad passed away shortly after their return home. 

Cirdan and Sam had been expecting the news, but it wasn't just geographical distance that blunted their grief. Despite having his sons, they barely knew the man. Meanwhile, production for Outlander was in full swing. Sam had no life outside of this family of cast/crew, simply living out of a suitcase in a hotel room, or on-set or trailer. Sam would often misplace things in a hectic environment only for them to turn up in due time. So, when Sam lost his phone after filming on location one day; Sam just assumed it would surface. Sam knew full well what was on it, which served to intensify his search. Sam asked around, but nobody had seen it. Sam couldn't halt production, so he patiently waited. His phone had vanished into thin air; and with it the sole recording of his father's account of his life. Sam had to tell himself that somehow in disappearance, it was a fitting epitaph.

Alongside the succession of Outlander, Sam has had success with a riveting series on Starz! called Men In Kilts: A Road Trip With Sam & Graham; which explores their Scottish homeland, delving into its culture and history!

Since this book's publication, in 2023-24, it was announced that the journey of Jamie & Claire Fraser would be coming to an end with a final season of Outlander. In the year(s) following this book's publication, Sam has had multiple irons in the fire with projects and notifications on the up/up. So, stay tuned. . . .!